Chapter 7 - The Nearly Tent
Bunny was from over the road. This is his story.
We stayed with another family for 18 months when mum left dad, with me and me sister in tow. She'd caught him canoeing with Aunty Karen (see chapter 2) so that were that. She had nowhere to go, her folks back in Manc disaproved anyway. I was 4. We lived with this other family in their house for a while, brother and sister like us, bit older. They were good to us and I never thanked them. Didn't really know what was going on, no change there. Mum worked her arse off (no not that kind of work) and saved up the cash to afford a mortgage on our own house 18 months later. Seven grand the house was, can you believe it? Money is now insane.
After mum sis and me had taken residence in our own place, we still saw the other nice family all the time, they were me Mum's best friends. We went there for Sunday dinner every week, it was awful. Not so much the company but the food. The other mother was proud of her new potato roaster thingy, but it had obviously come without instructions and the spuds were always black on one side and raw on the other. The green beans seemed to have strips of plastic inside them, I still don't understand it, and I hated the meat. I was such a fussy eater as a kid, swhy I'm a skinny little twut with a beer gat. And I was always told to stop playing footy with me mates and to be at their house at such and such a time, but the food was never ready for hours. If we hadn't had 240 Robert to watch on their posh telly I'd have gone gagaoolala. A colour telly, no less, not like ours. Nowadays TV is in colour but real life is only black and white.
So Bunny. He wasn't part of the other family we lived with, he lived across the road from them. He had an older brother Sonny, their dad helped at cub scouts. Names may have been changed. I didn't play with them much growing up, they were a bit rougher than us and besides, we only lived near them for a bit. I was small and timid and soft as shyte. Bunny was a year older than me, bigger and stronger, dark hair and freckles, though not as many as his brother. A bit loud. I do remember playing a Formula 1 board game with him and his mother outside on a sunny day one time. An F1 board game? Yeah for real. It was a bit boring but way more exciting than the real thing. Cars, they're just for A to B in my world.
Not sure how old I was, but this is years later when I was older. I knew it all but I've forgotten most of it now. I remember I'd been to visit me dad that day, which was unusual enough, he'd given me this old Eagle annual from the 60s that he'd picked up free somewhere, yeah thanks dad. Except it had Dan Dare in it which rocked of course. I knew Dare and his Mekon mate from 2000AD which was the best comic ever, I dandare you to argue. Harry20 on the high rock, rogue with his virtual buddies, flesh stronty dog and the rest. Feckin loved it.
Bunny had built a tent in his front garden, his dad may have helped. Proper tent with ropes and everything, very impressive. And he invited me for a sleepover in said tent. The offer took me by surprise. Bunny had never been particularly friendly towards me before, suddenly I was his new best mate. I was of the age where you'd sometimes have sleepovers with your mates, usually in a sleeping bag on yer mates bedroom floor. Endless talking and laughing punctuated by occasional interruptions from yer mates mum or dad telling you both to shut the feck up I've got work in the morning it's really late etc etc. I've now had that from both ends oo-er. Mum seemed OK with me tenting with Bunny, and what could be more exciting than a sleepover in a tent?
After we'd retired to our tent for the night, by torchlight I read my new old Eagle annual, Bunny read comics. I''m sure I remember his dad coming out to the tent once or twice telling us to keep it down, as per, we must have found something to talk about although I'm not sure we had tons in common. Somehow we ended up daring each other to take off our pyjama bottoms, and flourish the garments to prove that we were no longer wearing them, whilst we remained in our respective sleeping bags. And then we'd put them back on again, and we did. Kind of like doctors and doctors without the actual operation. Quite exciting as I recall, I think I'd played a similar game before, with no dire consequences.
Bunny suggested that we show each other our bits. I wasn't keen at all, and I told him so. Taking off your pants whilst safe in a sleeping bag was one thing I figured, but parading yourself in the all-together before someone you didn't know that well was quite another. I'd been as rude as I was prepared to get. I was shy and nervous and a bit scared, I hadn't played that game before. I didn't want to see Bunny's bits, I fancied girls, although at the time I'd probably have been scared of their bits too. Nah I'll just read me book. Suddenly Bunny was out of his sleeping bag and pulling down his jamas and showing me anyway, and I was trying not to look. Then he turned around and stuck his arse out, on all fours as you tend to be in a tent, and it wasn't a big tent. He pulled his jamas back up and told me it was my turn.
Fair's fair he said, and maybe he had a point. I may not have wanted to play the game but it was looking a bit late for that if you weren't especially assertive, and I was rather less so. Bunny was keen to see that the rules were going to be observed.
He was moving towards me when the back door banged open and his dad thundered out, proper angry this time, and dished out the big daddy of absolute rollockings aimed at both of us. Don't remember what he said but he was unmistakably annoyed and very expressive about it. Think Bunny even cried. I guess his dad, watching from the house, had seen the antics illuminated by our torches through the thin walls of the tent. Thank feck for that. Or maybe we were just being too noisy, but from the depth of his rage I suspect there was more to it than that. When he was done tearing strips off us and had marched back to his house, only guilty silence and sleep would ensue.
I think I fecked off early the next morning, before the Bunster remembered that only half the game had been played, and I hadn't wanted to play it anyway. He'd scared me and naughty games had lost their appeal. I scared easily back then, me so soft and niave. I didn't have any more sleepovers with people who weren't me best mates. I avoided him, and not long after he and his family moved away down south.
I've been lucky in life. I tell it how it was for me, my blogs are all true. Others have been far less fortunate in similar situations, and I'm sorry for them. I'd rather not upset anyone with my silly take on stuff, don't read it if yer don't like it, I was born to take the pass. There we are. It's a non-story, about something that didn't happen to me in a two-manner. I've got more nearlys than reallys in my tent. If you were looking for blog of the month you've followed a dodgy link, and I've run off with all your money.
Love, Stella X
