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The Fine Line

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From my own experiences I can see where you are coming from.I suspect it can be different for men but I think we all have moments when we think "What am I doing here"
I find it tends to happen when I have just cum and the buzz is wearing off.It doesn't happen all the time but I have had it on a couple of occasions.As a single operator it can be a bit tricky as usually my partner or partners are expecting me to be up for it.Perhaps that's the thing,the expectation we feel when in a sexual situation to perform.Group sex is very impersonal and I prefer one on one.Getting to know someone is important to me so large groups are not my thing,however one time dogging meets for example can be great.It is very much the same format but its fine to just finish and leave,no questions asked.Stick with it and enjoy.Maybe limit the amount of times you go to clubs as its like everything else,too much becomes mundane.Perhaps try something different.You don't say what you are into so maybe a new kink would keep it fresh.I have a very wide range of interests so I can meet with friends who also share my hobby so its not always the same thing.It would be great to know how you get on,hope to hear more.Tony ximg src="imagesadultemoticons029.gif"

possible solutions...

Maybe there is something in what he or the other person does or are doing, i.e. a trigger.

Maybe its just an off-daynight.

Does the other person look like someone or have a particular look.

Colours can trigger emotional responses if we associate particular feelings or memories to that colour.

Think back and try to look for a common factor.

RE:The Fine Line

Firstly, quite a few won't understand what you mean by dichotomy, probably thinking it's some sort of operation! :) But, what you are experiencing is a quite natural state of jealousy, which is good, as it shows you really care about your other half emotionally as well as physically. As long as you have your "safe word" in operation and you both react positively, keep on partying till you can no longer! img src="imagesadultemoticons028.gif" from me. Tom :)

hi

i think its normal to happen....but then u two are together in it.....so if he is enjoying u need not feel jealous...... or if u feel u cant handle the scene then both of u get out of it.....u know..... as u finish enjoying urself u get jealous of he enjoying himself,,, well thats not right
after all its a fact a woman can enjoy herself physically much more than man because biologically he is not capable beyond a point..... and yet.....so i think there is still a need of growing up on ur part.. and if it doesnt go away then u need to take a break from this and enjoy each others company

RE:The Fine Line

There is an old, appropriate saying," If you don't like the heat, stay out of the kitchen!".
However, men's sexuality IS different and if you have agreed with your man that he can behave like a dog in a 'bitch on heat' situation, then you only have yourself to blame if he shames you publically.
Frankly, I can't believe that you could put up with such thoughtless behaviour. Perhaps you should do likewise or be honest with yourself, having looked deeply in your mirror, are the years catching up - perhaps even showing ? Is everything headed south ?
Sadly, younger women are often drawn to older men but it is rare the other way round.
What is the long term answer ?
Find a much older partner who cares about you and is switched-on by your past life style and doesn't mind you enjoying yourself with other men of his peer group. I expect that you would be overwhelmed but go at his pace.
Don't hesitate to change your existing Partner as clearly he has no thought for your feelings.
Finally, the last laugh will be yours ! When your obnoxious man can no longer get a hard on or keep it up, you will still be able to lay on your back and enjoy the attention you deserve. Good luck!!!

RE:The Fine Line

The point about losing interest after cumming is valid for men but not so much for women. I once had a threesome where the man arrived fully cross dressed. He was so up for the encounter but once he had come he couldn't wait to get his fem clothes off.

How do you and your partner feel when you discuss it in the cold light of day? Are you up for more experiences or does one like you describe put you off for a long time?

It doesn't feel like time to change partners to me but it does need discussion if you are to continue your lifestyle.

RE:The Fine Line

No Mate, you just got to be sure that everybody is in agreement and that everyone envolved clicks. (physically and mentally). Hope this helpsimg src="imagesadultemoticons013.gif" img src="imagesadultemoticons013.gif"

fun

like always if both partners are having fun, this usually does'nt happen, but if one is not, then sometimes the green eyed monster comes out, probably also due to the fact that the one who is feeling like this is more than likely some what jealous as they may feel ignored. But being swingers is about yr partner gettinghaving pleasure too, so its swings & roundabouts. may the FUN continue. xx