Help or advice about unexpected jealously

I'm really looking for some advice from others more experienced than me, about the difficult subject of jealousy.

My partner is an experienced swinger, whereas I only started experimenting about 6 or 7 months ago. We've been together about a year (although we've known each other much longer) and we love each other. We've had a couple of threesomes FMF and some couple meets, been to a club together - and had a great time. On the whole I've loved everything we have done together. (I say 'on the whole' not because I'm ambivalent but because we had a couple of poor meets! But I figure that's just bad luck and bad communication and fairly normal.)

Swinging is very much part of my partner's identity - perhaps more so than either of us realised when we first got together. He has swung with partners and as a single male when he was unpartnered. He has one or two long term playmates which pre-date me and he continues to play with them. Broadly that hasn't bothered me.

I've tried a couple of single meets and I have to say it's not really for me. The thrill I get from swinging is seeing my partner having fun, whilst having fun myself. To me, the whole thing enhances everything we already experience together and at the same time, when we are alone together it then makes our sex life feel even more intimate and sexy.

But, my partner enjoys single meets with other women or women and their husbands (he's straight) - both with old playmates and looking for new. In fact, it's possible to say he craves them. I have found this incredibly threatening and am really struggling with jealousy. It's not an emotion I've felt much before and I'm at a loss how to manage it. I don't really understand why I have no jealousy about couples meets - in fact, on the contrary I enjoy watching my partner with another woman and I'm generally ok (admittedly it's a managed emotion) with his long term playmates.

Of course, I know the answer is to communicate and then communicate some more and we have. I have explained how I feel and he has agreed not to look for new playmates - however, he's only just found 2-3 new playmates, and I find myself consumed with jealousy when he arranges a meet with them (we don't live together and only really see each other at weekends).

I'm hoping someone has some words of wisdom. The jealousy is threatening both my enjoyment of this new world that i'm discovering and my relationship. I know the typical answer is that when jealousy rears it's ugly head, there is little that can be done, but there must be some way to restore my rational mind!

hope you can help
Bluerose17

Jealousy

Hi Bluerose,
I suspect that your love for him is quite different from his love for you. You love him as a long term partner but he appears to love you the same as one of his many long term swinging partners. Look at the facts. You only spend weekends with him and I bet you go to a club and you watch him flirt and swing with other women on Saturday night. He's a player and you're one of his fuck buddies. Don't be jealous lovely Blue Rose. Become a Red Rose and find someone who will really love and deserve you!
David xx