Linda : 10 Years Of My Life

I was young, my brother and I went to the local Smith Crisp factory's Christmas party.
'Ok now get in line, you 2 get blue wrapped presents'.
My turn and given a present ,

I unwrap it and find a large doll.Is this right?
Its taken from me and receive another blue present.Its a wagon train with some Calvary.
Now 8,

I still don't get the gist why some girls wore dresses and some like me wore shorts,.
Its April and my birthday and at the party my dad takes a photo while I sit next to my girlfriend,

I go red in the face.

Mum said ah he's blushing.
All I could think of was I just wanted to try on her pretty party dress.
Is it not my turn to wear a dress yet?
When I was younger

I thought something wasn't quite right.
Its difficult to put into words.
I had heard stories at school, something about not being born right?
As you know youngsters think differently about things any way.
So I decided to act on the stories.
I asked my dad if I could see my birth certificate.
I made up some rubbish for the reason (he wasn't too pleased about it though).
He got the certificate out and showed me.
Looking at it, I made some comment for cover.
I had seen what I had wanted.
Walking away, I said thank you and went to my bedroom.
I cried and cried.
It had said;'boy'.
I just was amazed and couldn't sort it out in my mind.
The next few days passed.It had got to me, and I thought, NO!
Its got to be wrong, or somethings just not right with it.
So I made plans to experiment for the future.
I saved all my pocket money / birthday / xmas money.
I also went to the old part of the area I lived at in Coddington Notts and collected lots of Brambles (Large Wild Blackberries) and went around the married quarters selling them, I made quite a lot of money from that.
A short time later while I was at Mount Lane School Newark I overheard 2 teachers talking about wine, and wanting Rose-hips.
I was cheeky and asked them what they were.
If they was what I thought I said I may be able to get a lot for them,

They described what they were and i said I would bring in a handful of what i could get.
Next day after collecting some again from the old RAF ruins at Coddington,

I took in a few and showed them to the 2 teachers.
'How many could I get'? they asked, 'give me over the weekend and I will bring in as many as I can carry'.
Monday came I was overloaded with the damn things, they had better make it worth it I thought.
'All collected legal and above board,' I said, as they gave me money, I didnt realise I could get that much, blimey that much?
So nothing was suspected about buying stockings and pantyhose, I hid them by stuffing them down the front of my shirt, and of course still bought my comic and sweets every saturday down Appletongate while Dad bought the Fish and Chips from the shop opposite.
Once I remember I nearly got caught wearing pantyhose and knickers.
It was a Saturday morning, mum and dad had gone to Newark to do the weeks shopping, so I did as usual and locked the kitchen door (the done thing in those days was not to lock your door if you was in).
Then I went upstairs and got my things and went into the toilet to put them on.
I loved the feeling it gave me, then all of a sudden, I heard the kitchen door handle being tried, then banging on the door.
It was dad shouting my name, as soon as that had started I took off the pantyhose and knickers and got my trousers back on, stuffing them into my pocket, I ran down stairs and unlocked the door.
Dad screamed at me 'why have you locked the door'? I said, 'I had to go to the toilet and knew I was going to be a long time', 'well don't lock the door again' ! he yelled.
That was so close, not seen dad so mad with me since I had, with my brother at a previous home, burnt all the grass covering an old air raid shelter nearby, ouch, the belt we had, we knew never to do that again.
We moved from Coddington only a few months later to a village near Lincoln.
When I was younger, I wrote a small list out and went to Lincoln with my parents.
They went normal household shopping, I said I was going to Boots and Ruddock's (they sold records etc. then).
I actually went close to a department store with a women's lingerie area the store was called Mawer and Collingham, with my list.

I went to the lingerie department and asked a lady asistant for help.
Showing the list of things which my 'girlfriend' had dared me to get for her.
I had written down knickers, stockings, suspender belt and bra, suggested makes also sizes and the colour blackI had prices in mind but I was lucky with the prices as the assistant had spoken to her supervisor and took pity on my dilemma with the money I had and gave me a discount.
When I put on my new lingerie. (it wasn't a fetish thing not that I knew that word anyway).
It just felt natural.I had a hell of a time hiding the things.

I wrapped them in my normal clothes and had to make sure I kept all my 3 drawers in 6 drawer chest spotless so mum would just leave well alone.
In the next 2 years until I started work I kept check on club books keeping an eye on female fashion, making notes of what worked with what.
I, as all youngsters started on a low wage.
But I didn't want to buy cheap as I had started with nice things Wonderbra, and other known makes.
To still cover myself I bought my comic and sweets and still put a little money on 1 side for renewing MY lingerie.I again hit on an idea, to help make things a little more affordable.
That was going to be around my next birthday, and would change the way I thought from then on.
But sadly something was about to happen a few weeks before my birthday that nearly finished me off as a person.
I ran into HATE in a bad way, it changed my life.
Trouble is so many bad people nothing happens too them, mores the pity.

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