THERE’S NO NEED TO HURRY
What follows is just my opinion. I do not claim to be right!
When we meet a contact, how long should it be before we get intimate with them? Obviously, there is no single answer to that question, so let’s explore the subject.
Outside of the swinging scene, when we are dating, it usually takes at least three dates before we see each other naked and become physical. The difference between that and meeting a person/people with a view to swinging is that we know if we like each other enough it will lead to sexual activity, but not develop into a committed relationship. However, should this knowledge change the pace and progress of events? Personally, I don’t think so.
In my opinion, whoever you are going to ‘share a bed’ with needs to be a person or people you like and feel at ease with. We are aiming to give and receive pleasure, so we must be comfortable with all those involved. I do not believe that it is generally possible to reach that state of connection in under three meetings, and maybe is not advisable if we are seeking fulfilling experiences.
Let’s consider how it might occur, to better explain my thinking. Once we agree to meet up, we arrange a time and place, such as a bar, where we can spend an hour or so making initial contact. In that time we will know whether or not we like each other. Assuming we do, for me it would seem to be a good idea to perhaps go for a meal somewhere for the second meeting, so we can spend much more time finding out interesting things about each other. We need to talk, so is best to avoid anywhere too noisy. Afterwards, and before going our separate ways, why not take a stroll and look in shop windows, or by the sea, or anywhere peaceful and relaxing. At this point it is likely that we will all want to organise a meet where things can be taken further. This will be at someone’s home. Whether or not we eat is a matter for mutual agreement, but once settled down in the living room with a drink and some background music, someone has to make the first move, and that should be by the host/hostess. We will all have our own ideas on this, but the two ways that appeal to me are either to instigate some dancing, or to propose a simple game, ideally with cards, to get everyone out of their clothes, and then start the dancing!
There is a huge benefit to taking time, because if the first experience goes well, it will lead to many more, which will get better and better.
So, don’t hurry, but take time to establish a foundation to build the eroticism and sexual pursuits upon. There should never be pressure of any kind on anybody; it is not a competition and there is nothing to prove. Always show respect, and take nothing for granted.
As with so many things in life, it is as important to enjoy the journey as well as the destination. Getting to know new friends expands our horizons, and can be so rewarding.
