What is "Friends with Benefits"? A friends with benefits relationship is one in which two people are physically intimate with one another, yet they’re not committed to each other in any way. People involved in a friends with benefits relationship clearly enjoy spending time together and hooking up, but their relationship isn’t romantic and has no strings attached.
Pretty simple to understand, so do we call anyone we have had a one-night stand with as a FWB? The answer to that question is a big fat "NO". To be a FWB, one needs to start with a modicum of friendship, that eventually leads to a NSA sexual relationship.
The sexual a part of a new connection may be easy to acquire, of course. But what about the "friends" element? A friend is usually someone you trust and who trusts you—a relationship that develops through shared history, experiences, situations, circumstances, compatibility, or mutual interests. When you are looking for an FWB arrangement with someone from the beginning , you're forcing a brand new potential relationship into a box which will not fit, with a label which will misrepresent it. Since it takes time to cultivate a friendship, it logically follows that it should require time and dedication to seek out out if one can or should cultivate a friendship with benefits with someone.
I see the word FWB being thrown around so casually, that it seems to have completely lost its meaning and somehow morphed into a relationship I do not recognize anymore. This might seems old fashioned, which I admit I can be sometimes, but I strongly feel people should at least remember what FWB used to mean. I do not want in the course of time loose the narrative on the wonderful experiences that I hold dear with people I have had this amazing relationship with.Cheers!
