I have always been more comfortable in and around feminine items. When I was 16 I discovered how great panty hose felt and then I discovered how panties made me feel when I wore them. I always felt like there was something missing. Interesting enough, I didn't discover it until I discovered the internet. That is when I really discovered crossdressing and Trans Women. The more I looked, the more I wanted to be the women I saw. Beautiful, sexy, flirty, slutty, classy, and sometimes downright dirty. I loved the feminine features that I was so turned on by. Then there was the something extra. I never thought I would be attracted to a cock. But the more I saw of these sexy women with their cocks the more I wanted to taste one and feel one. I finally got my chance and I was amazed. I enjoyed sucking on that cock, and then when I thought I wouldn't enjoy anything more, I got penetrated. It wasn't as painful as I though. She lubed me well and within minutes I was moaning like a whore telling her to fuck me harder. I thought after that encounter that I could now live my life as I planned. I got married a few times. The sex was never as satisfying as I would have liked. Deep down I knew what it was. I wanted to be the one on bottom getting filled. I wanted to be the one wearing sexy lingerie and high heels. I wanted my wife to put on a strap-on and make me feel like a woman. I never had the guts to tell them. It might have saved one of my marriages if I had just opened up and let them know that this is what I wanted. But I chickened out every time. Now though, I am free to follow that path. Haven't had much luck, but I am hoping now that I have decided to follow this path that I will. Now-a-days though it is just me and Andylynn Payne or Alisia Rae or Lianna Lawson or Korra Del Rio. Seeing them give or get what I want puts me in state where the only thing I can do is grab my favorite toy and masturbate. Having an orgasm watching them while being filled by 8" is phenomenal. I know that they are adult stars and some have had work done to them. But the fact is the same. I miss the intimacy with a Trans Woman or Woman with a strap-on inside of me. This journey has just started for me in becoming the woman I want to be. I hoping for the brass ring but if I get some friends with benefits or maybe even a Goddess to serve I will have started to become more me.
The pics are me. As you can see I have a ways to go physically. But I would love to meet that someone that will nurture and support me.
Michelle (Michael)
