RESPECT – THOUGHTFULNESS AND CONSIDERATION
Many people ask for, and expect, respect; some even demand it! I understand that they want the people they come into contact with to show thoughtfulness, and be considerate and discreet, which is all fair enough.
Respect is a word that has a different meaning. We show respect to those who are kind and helpful to us, those who are thoughtful, considerate and discreet, where appropriate, and those who have achieved against the odds. In other words, respect is something that cannot be demanded; it must be earned and deserved.
The word is also used in a slightly different way, especially in the swinging lifestyle. For example, some will ask you to respect their boundaries, and that is different to them asking to be respected as people.
Personally, I assume all to be worthy of respect until they prove otherwise! Being polite is a social requirement in my opinion and is respectful. However, there is a difference between polite good manners and real respect.
Polite courtesy is ‘cold’ by comparison with the ‘warmth’ of respect. It is often the case that we hold respect for those who have done great and good things from which humanity has benefited, although it is unlikely that many of us have actually met these people. On the personal level of interaction, respect is not really possible until we get to know someone quite well. This may happen quickly, or take some time because we are all different and respond in different ways, each at our own pace.
Why do I give respect to all you may ask? It is for one very simple reason; I try to convey my warmth to the people I meet, rather than come across as being coolly polite. Furthermore, this approach tends to elicit a suitably warm response from the other person.
The most important respect that we should give is for the right of all individuals to lead and fulfill their life in their own way. I have no problems with whatever anyone does provided it does not negatively impact upon my life. It is easy to separate what is right from what is wrong by asking a simple question; will what I am about to do have a bad effect on another person? If it will not, it’s absolutely fine, and that, I believe, is giving true respect to everyone.
