The current pandemic situation may be causing havoc with our dating lives, but people in long distance relationships have been making relationships work for years. Is there something we can learn from them now to make life more bearable if we’re not under the same roof as our significant other during a lockdown? I’ve done a little research so that you don’t have to, so lets take a look…
1: Greetings
So, it might sound daft, but something as simple as saying “good morning” and saying “goodnight” sound incredibly basic, but also are pretty essential if you want to keep a relationship alive. It lets them know you’re thinking of them and, while they’re not in the same building, they’re still part of your routine. It may be the simplest thing, but it’s super important.
2: Shared experiences
Suggesting a book, movie or TV show to watch together is a winner. Not only does it give you something to talk about, but it’s the sensation of sharing an experience, even miles apart, that deepens a bond. You could always make a movie part of a regular date night and be ready to hit ‘play’ at the same time so you can text throughout. It’s the next best thing to actually belong there.You could even take it a step further and have the same dinner. If they’re nearby, you could order from the same take-out place or, if you’re a little more practical and gastronomically minded, you could fire up a video call and select a recipe to cook together if you have the time. You can have your catch up, spend some quality time and get to eat the same dinner. It’s the next best thing to a face-to-face date.
3: Communication
While we’re on the subject of video calling, make a date for some virtual face-to-face time at least once a week. There’s something much better about being able to see who you’re talking to. Getting that eye contact in. Make it fun and swap smiles with each other. You don’t get to do that on the phone. Plus, you can always schedule some naughty facetime too if that’s your thing. It’s all about finding the right balance of communication. Too much and it starts to feel like a chore, too little and we feel distant and alone. Find the balance and see what works!
4: Time To Yourself
Time to yourself is still important in any relationship. Make sure you’re getting your alone time when you need it. There’s a reason all those old cliches like “absence makes the heart grow fonder” still exist. Long distance relationships don’t mean pining for each other all hours of the day and night. It’s only going to work if you’re both comfortable with your own company. Make sure you take time to make yourself happy and do your own things. You can even chat about what you’ve been up to next time you talk. Hearing about and telling someone your unique experiences is equally as important as sharing experiences. Plus, if you can’t live apart from someone, you might not be able to live with them. If it helps, take this period as a challenge and see what you’ve got.
5: Knowing their life
A little knowledge of their schedule, working hours and routine is going to show that you pay attention and make them feel as important as they should feel. Plus, it means that if you don’t get an immediate response, you don’t start to feel jealous or put out. The whole process is going to take effort on both sides, but at the same time, shouldn’t feel like a chore. If you’re naturally in tune with each other’s rhythms, you should figure this out pretty quickly and be able to avoid the times where one of you is likely busy and a little stressed or short tempered.It also helps if you want to be there for them after they’ve has a less-than-perfect day. Relationships aren’t all about the cutsey, fluffy stuff. They’re just as much about caring and support as any of that other stuff. You both need to listen as much as speak.
6: Gifts
I’m not talking about dazzling, expensive things here, but simple things, like an exchange of something small and sentimental or a postcard or something. There’s a certain thrill to receiving something in the regular post these days rather than electronically, which is often the norm now. While the digital world is great, physical objects are nice too and can provide much more of a connection between people. If you swap little love tokens at random intervals, it’s sure to get those feel-good feelings bubbling away. Even a handwritten love letter with some of your perfume on it or a nice inexpensive token like that. That way, you can excite multiple senses at once. Plus, if exciting senses is what you fancy, you could even try sending each other toys or intimate apparel, so they can think of you.
There’s no textbook when it comes to these things, but these few tips could bring just the spark you’ve been looking for. Remember, this situation isn’t forever and we’ll get back to normal eventually. Plus, if people were into long distance relationships were a thing before our current pandemic-reality, then maybe there’s something to them and they’re worth giving a try.
Have you got any long distance tips to keep those fires burning? Join in the conversation in the comments and let us know! And until next time, stay safe, stay sane and stay…. Vidalicious x
