Stud vs Slut - Why are promiscuous women labeled as "sluts" when promiscuous men are praised for the

The word 'slut' exists for good reason. The sexual double standard exists for good reason. Here's why.

Men pursue, women are pursued
In courtship, men and women are playing different games. Men pursue, and women are pursued. Whilst sex is pleasureable for both men and women, pleasure is not the only outcome of sex (i.e. in the days before the contraceptive pill). Women want sex as much men do, but the consequences of sex are unequal: only women are at risk of pregnancy."Men pursue, women are pursued" is the fundamental difference between men and women in the courtship game, and it means success is measured on different scales.

Man's success, woman's success

A man's success is measured by the number of women he has "caught", because the man pursues. A woman's success is measured by the quality of the man she accepts, because they are pursued.

Don't picture a greyhound chasing a rabbit. In that game, the greyhound is successful if it catches the rabbit, and the rabbit is successful if it escapes. In human courtship, the woman does want to be caught eventually, but only when she is satisfied that she is being caught by the best quality man chasing her. ('Quality' here means all sorts of things: how much he loves her, whether he will stay with her and provide for her 
children, support her through life etc.)

Women who are labelled 'slut'

Women call other women 'sluts' when they give in too easily, and ruin the game for those women still playing by the rules. Sluts get all the male attention and the women who are trying to find the best male partner possible can not compete with her. Women recognize the cheater and throw her out of the game with the label 'slut'.

What men think of sluts

Men recognize sluts too, and they do not respect them. To men, sluts are disposable objects of pleasure, not potential mothers. When a man is looking for a woman to be the mother of his children, he will not choose a slut because she has proven that she is cheating the game: she is not holding out for a high-quality male, so being with her is no proof of his own high quality. Also, there is the paternity issue, which is the flipside of the pregnancy outcome of sex: the woman carries the baby, so it's definitely hers, but who is the father? The instinct is to protect your own c-h-ild with your life, not someone else's.

Aren't 'sluts' just liberated?

No. Women who see the double standard and think it's an oppressive hypocrisy are gravely mistaken. They see a man getting high-fives and pats on the back for all his 'conquests' and think it should be the same for them. Here's the crucial point: equality is not sameness.Men play their game, by the rules of their game. Women do not win by following the rules of the men's game: the woman's game has completely different rules, and women win by playing those. Men and women are different, but they can still be equal - equality is not sameness.
Happy swinging - you are the best people who has the strong relationship and mutual respect to your spouse 

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