10:30 am Wednesday, 13th November, 2019
Rejection is hard, whether you're the one doing the rejecting or on the receiving end of being rejected, it hurts. Either way, the person who has been rejected is usually left in a worse off state, questioning "what did I do wrong?" or "am I not good enough?". That is because the one doing the rejecting has not respectfully handled things to minimise those thoughts. While on the subject of disrespectful ways to handle rejecting someone...ghosting (cutting all contact with no explanation), it can seem like the easiest option but let me tell you; it is...for you...but incredibly hurtful for the person.
So put your adult pants on and check out these helpful tips from a recent Reddit thread, on how to reject someone politely when they just don't float your boat.
Keep It Super Simple
"Thanks, I'm flattered but not interested/available."
— amgov
You Don't Own Them An Explanation
Just tell them you're not interested. You don't have to get into it any more than that. It's not harsh, it's just direct. Rejection sucks no matter how much you sugar-coated so you may as well be clear.
"No thank you, I'm not interested."
— jewelrider
Keep Things General
Don't quote personal traits as reasons for rejection. It is seen as a personal attack. you can suggest that you are incompatible instead
— anothermeanguy
Be As Clear As Possible
I think this line works, saves face for everyone, is super clear, and gets the message across
"I'm sorry, I just didn't feel a connection."
— GenderNeutralPat
Remember That, If They Push Further, They're Acting Rude — You Aren't
You just say something like, "Sorry, I'm not interested." or "No."
If you want to be extra gentle about it, you can say something like, "I'm flattered, but not interested.", "No, thank you.", or "Thank you for asking, but I'm not interested." If they push for anything beyond that, they are the ones being rude.
— nevertruly
Tell Them You're Not Interested
"Sorry, not interested."
It is best to be as honest and blunt as possible. I find that sugar-coating it too much (ex "I'm just not into a relationship right now") won't give them the right message and they are more likely to sit around and wait for you to be ready. Clear communication is best. You also don't need to give a reason, though. Just say "not interested". If they push for a reason, repeat the statement and cut off communication.
— 11summer
Accept The Fact That You're Going To Hurt Them
No matter what you tell, they're going to feel upset. All you can do is reduce the impact it has on them by emphasising why you decided to leave them, and if it's their fault, tell them about it so they can better themselves and move on.
The more you sugar coat it, the longer it will hurt then. Get straight with your intention to speak with them and leave them with a positive note. That's all you can do. What they do next is up to them and them only.
— Memestranaut
Just Simply Say "No."
"No thank you."
You don't need to explain yourself. You don't need to defend yourself. If they press about reasons, tell them you're not feeling it, and that that won't change.
If they press more after that, they're rude, and you can stop being nice to them.
— Svataben
Go With The Golden Rule And Treat Them The Way You'd Like To Be Treated
Maybe just reject them the way you'd prefer to be rejected when you're doing the asking, Golden Rule-style.
— VistaVizion
Tell Them You Have No Chemistry
You're really great, but I don't feel we have chemistry.
— LAgate
How do you handle rejecting someone politely? Let us know in the comments below?
