10:21 am Tuesday, 1st April, 2014
Have you been scorned? Do you feel cheated? Does revenge sound right up your street? Well, put down those bunnies and hot water for we have 3 top ideas for getting back at your ex.
*please note this article is for entertainment purposes only. Moving on is always highly recommended.
Hack Away
Hack your ex’s Facebook and start sending out some ‘secretly in love with you pm’s’ (delete sent messages), follow up with choice ‘sad single’ page follows, and finally get commenting on local radio stations and local Government Facebook pages as to the ‘abundance of ugly, weird and un-educated losers in your local area who are not suitable for dating’. Poignantly blaming your local Government for not making an effort as to the quality of it’s community, and the local radio stations for not addressing the issue any sooner. Sign off.
Make It A Carboot
Sell their shit! Yup, from the stuff they won’t collect to all the pointless gifts they gave you that now mean nothing. Alternatively, erect a huge sign above your front door requesting that your two timing ex (face picture included) needs to come back and pick up their stuff before you give it all away for the nearest taker.
Move Up A League Or Two
So you might get in trouble for the last two but by far the best way to get revenge is to get over it. Our suggestion is to bounce back fast. Get fit, look sexy at every opportunity, get out with your mates, book that holiday, start dating again and post every piece of the new you up on your social media accounts for the world to see. Leave the loser behind!
You really need to way up the pros and cons of getting your own back for how they have made you feel, after all, it is just a feeling that you will be acting on. We highly recommend number 3 as our top idea to get revenge. You might be faking it to begin with, but after a while you might just realize the fun that you’re having now has helped and you’ve moved on. We are sure that if you can fake it to begin, concentrate on yourself, fill your life with excitement and things to look forward to, that in a couple of months you might look back and realize what a loser your ex was, and what a lucky escape you have just had.
