To be perfectly honest with you I knew about the birds and the bees by the time I was age 9 from all the foul language in school, but I didn't let on that I was actually a boy. I liked giving everyone the impression I was a girl and I was really good at it. It's amazing what I could get boys to do for me with a little sweet talking. Of course there was some bullies that liked to pick on me and pull my hair but the boys that liked me and the teachers didn't put up with it very long when I started to cry. Only once did I have to punch a boy in the nose. He just wouldn't get out of my face when I was in the outfield trying to throw the baseball! No, I didn't throw it like a girl.......so what! lol
When my mother and I went shopping she like to get me to try on clothes all the time. I learned to go along with it so she would buy me some candy or some ice cream. She would always tell me that I looked so pretty..............I told her that I wanted to grow up and be as beautiful as her and she would always smile...........
When I was age 10 my mom would insist that I take my vitamins. One of them was pink with writing on it. I couldn't figure out why sometimes they were blue. One day I saw the package and I found out they were birth control pills and that they came from the abortion clinic. I asked my mother about them and she told me that I needed to take them so I didn't get pregnant if a boy kissed me. I say another word about it to her after that. Instead I went to the library and did a little research..........Well it actually turned into a lot of research and I found out they were actually estrogen pills and a little too much would actually keep a girl from getting pregnant, but I also learned that estrogen was what gave a women their female characteristics and it was made naturally at puberty. At that point on I knew how girls grew breast. I really wanted breast and to look like a women but it seemed like it was taking forever. I didn't see any advantage to being a guy. They had to do all the heavy grunt work and be all ruff and tough.
One day I got the bad news that we were moving to the other side of town and I would have to go to a new school. Well, after we moved school turned out to be okay but I had a hard time making new friends. I got picked on and no one would help me when I cried fortunately the school year was almost over and summer break was upon us.
Most of the summer I felt really intense and I just wanted to scream and the only thing that seemed to help is a supejuice mixture I made of alcohol and instant tea. Someone in church said I had raging hormones, and I was asked to leave one Sunday morning by the pastor for stating my badass opinion during a sermon about Mary's boyfriend splitting on her after he saw her with David. They were too damn broke to go to the hospital so Jesus had to be born in a mangy horse barn. The reason the 3 farm hands showed up was it was time to go to work because the brightest star was the fucking sun for christ sakes!
My dad and mom didn't go to church, they just dropped us off and went out to breakfast.
so when the pastor showed up at the house he blamed my parents for my behavior. My dad started swearing at the pastor and physically threw him out the door. Needless to say we got excommunicated. What was amazing was my dad just laugh his ass off when I told him what I said in church.
It wasn't long and we joined a different church and the pastor took the time to council me. Then he invited a psychiatrist to sit in on a couple of our meetings. The psychiatrist said I had ADHD and wrote me a script for benzedrine. After I started taking it I started feeling a lot better and didn't feel the need to drink. Every week I went for counselling at the church and saw the psychiatrist every month.
My birthday was in August so when I started school again in Junior high I was 11 years old. I got sent to the principal's office a lot for disturbing the class. Finally my parents got called in and when I got home from school my mother tried to spank me with a belt. I just laughed at her and no matter how hard she tried I wouldn't stop. Then I made the mistake of screaming at her that I was going to wait until she went to sleep and beat her over the head with a baseball bat. She grounded me for life with no TV privileges. That was bad enough but then she wouldn't talk to me and my dad gave me the cold shoulder too. My brother and sister seemed like they were always mad at me. I guess I was kind of mean to them.........I didn't know how to fix this problem and I felt totally trapped. Everything went wrong after I quit taking my medicine! Well, okay I admit selling it was easy money. My dad had a bar down in our finished basement and I took a little bit of booze from each of about 20 bottles, mixed it with coffee and took it to school. Between classes I would take a hit from my locker.
By lunch time I was feeling pretty good and that intense feeling went away and I learn for the first time what an aphrodisiac was. I was so horney!!! But I didn't have a hard on. I just wanted to to be gang banged by every guy in school. The problem was I didn't have a vagina, testicle but no visable penus either. Well I got the idea to put my testicles up inside me and band my sack with a rubber band. Problem solved! When the school bell rang after lunch I headed for the boys locker room with my super-juice in hand.
After I got into the boys locker room I stood in front of the guys changing into their uniforms. They all stopped what they were doing and one of them said, What the hell do you want bitch?" Then they saw the bottle in my hand and one of them walked up to me, then turned to the other guys and told them that I was fuck up. Then I dropped to my knees. Two of the guys picked me up off the floor by my arms and walk me to the door and shoved me out into the hallway. The hall was totally empty and I knew I was late for class. I felt sick, my testicle hurt. I headed straight to the girls bathroom, broke the rubber band then threw up in the toilet. I had never been more scared in my life than when I was standing in front of those guys in the locker room. From that day forward I always took my medication and never touched a drop of liquor again.
