My First Rather Nervous Post

I thought for my first Blog I would introduce myself, if such a thing is possible when Blogging.

I am an ex Military man who served for 22 years and enjoyed every minute of it and would do it all again tomorrow. I had a great time travelled to various countries and was proud of the fact that I defended the nation. I would still be doing it if I hadn’t injured my back in a stupid fall that rather curtailed my career plans but that’s the cards I was dealt. I am also a Biker who rides a black Honda CB13.

When I left in 07 I thought that new horizons beckoned. What I failed to realise was that my wife wanted a military man and once that side of me was over the trouble started. Sex had been stopped for years and was used more and more as a weapon against me. If I did the slightest thing wrong in her eyes she’d storm off or go out of her way to pick an argument with me just so she could use that as an excuse to go out and stay with her daughter. I began to feel shunned and alone, hit depression (sort of) and even contemplated ending my life my feeling of worthlessness had hit such a low. After many arguments and a constant back down by myself every time and me changing everything about me to try and accommodate what she required it resulted in nothing more than the suspension of the inevitable break up.

So a month or so ago she decided she wanted out and started making moves to leave. Various items of furniture have disappeared separate bank accounts etc etc which have left me feeling rather worthless and un-wanted which is a shame because I am a genuinely gregarious man who would rather have some fun and laughs than be unhappy but that’s life at the moment.

I am hoping this Blog will be a sort of note pad to the things I am going through and will help me to come out of the other side (so to speak) and find who I am and my self worth again.

I have a big heart that at the moment has taken a beating (no pun intended ha ha) but I hope any of you who become regular readers of my writings and random babblings will see the changes I go through as I journey to become the witty gentleman who is sexual and full of fun I know is hiding inside me somewhere just trying to get out.

I know I will have up days and down days and being shy (because of the situation and of the way my feelings have been battered) probably doesn’t help much but there isn’t much I can do about that at the moment apart from keeping my chin up and the belief that I can make it on my own until I find romance and love once again.

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