Husband
Without a doubt the first mistake we made was also our biggest. It is an easy mistake to make and I imagine the younger you are when you start the more likely you are to make it. It can be summarised in a single statement:
Going too fast too soon.
At age nineteen we found a website containing an example of a “slave contract”. Being young and inexperienced it seemed to us a good idea to construct our own with this reference as inspiration. We were not helped by the fact that discussing and drafting said document aroused us both, egging us on to make it as serious as we felt we could reasonable commit to. It turned out that our faith in our young selves was a little bit misplaced.
Whenever either of us felt the other was not devoting enough time to the maintenance of our “special” relationship we would argue and the terms of the contract would be endlessly discussed. It led to bitter rows and on multiple occasions came to a hairs-breadth of bringing our relationship to an end. There was one incident in particular when we were twenty-three years of age that really shook the foundations of our relationship. Suffice to say an incident occurred due to a limitation imposed on Wife’s behaviour that she was unable to accept. This led to a two day trial separation followed by reconciliation and a realisation that the relationship had to change.
Before this point I had always seen a “total power exchange” relationship as the dominant partner taking whatever they desired from the submissive partner, and for the submissive partner to derive their happiness solely from choosing to serve their Master. This view was not formed through any selfishness, but from reading accounts from practitioners more than twice our age and in a position to dedicate themselves to their relationships as full-time professions. I had to realise that their accounts did not apply to Wife and myself and that no matter how much I would like it there was no way that Wife and I could be as serious as twenty-three as they were at forty-six. As a powerfully dominant personality, and a highly intelligent man, I found this hard to swallow, but only by swallowing it were we able to progress to the point we are at today.
Today Wife is an extremely obedient submissive. She has performed admirably in a large number of different sexual activities. It is probably fair to say that if an activity has a name Wife will have performed it for Husband’s benefit (little point going into a full list, the above sentence should let you know how fantastically obedient she has become). This has not been achieved with brutal punishment regimes (although Wife is rightly punished when she lets me down) but more through reasoning, persuasion and reward, which is normally the enjoyment she ends up deriving from acts that she had little idea would be pleasurable when done in the correct atmosphere of Master/Slave. I instructed her to read “The Story of O” (she already owned books by Penny Birch which we would highly recommend to anyone thinking of following in our footsteps . . . Regime is very good) to show her that choosing to submit sexually and fully to a Master is a concept that is as old as the hills. Indeed, more than anything else, it has been by finding Wife examples of other people choosing to embark on the journey for the first time that has most helped in changing her mindset to the relationship.
So to conclude my advice to any young dominants out there is that one night of talking is worth ten nights of punishment and that reward for your submissive is equally important. Even if your submissive does genuinely derive enjoyment from simply following your commands, to call yourself a real Master you must be able to make your slave feel better than she would in a conventional relationship. A submissive who understands that unparalleled pleasure will follow the pain, will endure the pain. Learn to master your submissive’s happiness before you master your submissive.
More advice next time.
