November 18 update. Awakening

Well, time for an update.

Having dressed as often as I could, and continued my game of pulling into lay-bys, I decided to take the next step and meet. I spoke with another gurl online, fairly close to me in terms of distance. We seemed to get along, exchanged fairly similar stories of loving to dress but not having the confidence to really do anything beyond that. We arranged to meet at her office at around 9.30 in the evening, when she would be working late alone. I was working some distance away and took the opportunity to dress for the journey back. Several sexy text chats on the way back - thank you Siri - and I arrive at the location I have been told to park at, text to say I’m here. Heart pounding at the thought of an actual meet. And then silence. No more texts. Tried calling the number - no reply. Wait for for 30 mins before giving it up as a waste of time. Never heard from her again.

Two weeks later and another girl wants to meet - that evening, again close by. I change my plans, get dressed, drive out to where we have agreed. Nothing, no one there, no replies to texts - another waste of time. Oh, well, I’m dressed and horny, so out comes the laptop, pair to the phone and log in to see if there is anyone nearby. And there is my supposed date in the chatrooms, happily trying to arrange dates for the next day. What an utter arse! I pm’d her and got some b/s excuse about not being able to make it and “oh gosh, just realised the text to let you know hadn’t sent”. Yeah, right!

What is it with people? If you get held up, can’t make it or get cold feet at least have the decency to let the other person know.

And then I did meet a really lovely girl from this site, we had a great time and she took me to a club. It was a very quiet night there, but I felt sooo out of place. My head really was not ready for a full on public outing and I felt very self conscious - and definitely not able to dance in heels.

Back to lay-by flashing in the twilight and dark for me until I’m feeling more confident.

A couple of months pass, and I decide to respond to an ad from another gurl. Exchange numbers, text back and forth and finally arrange an evening car meet in a lay-by. I have a good feeling about this one. I dress in my tartiest attire and set off. Find the lay-by and park to wait. After about 15 minutes - I was early - I have noticed that there seems to be a lot of cars parking, doors opening and closing and people getting into cars and others wandering off. A quick internet check on the phone and Oh My - I have managed to agree to a meet in a gay cruising area. EEEK! No no no no. You see, I’d fantasied about guys, but that was it, just fantasy. I wanted to be with gurls and wanted to be, no, correction - am - top only. That’s it, end of story.

I slid down in the seat and tried to look inconspicuous. Texted the gurl I was meeting to find out where she was, no response. Oh no, not again, tried 3 more times, still no reply. Dammit!! I’ve got all worked up at the thought of meeting - and all for nothing again. Grrrr. Time to go home.

That’s it, I’ve had enough, fed up with having my time wasted getting dressed and made up, fed up spending time keeping smooth. And especially annoyed at actually being asked to meet at a place like this where my discomfort level is now through the roof. 
I make my decision then and there - time to drop the clothes down to the charity shop, makeup into the bin and give up the silliness.At which point a van pulled up alongside, could this be my date? I look out quickly and can see in the reflection of the lights - nope it’s a guy. The van reverses in behind me and parks, I switch my engine on to get some heat to clear the screen and wait while it does its job. And see the door behind me open and a shadowy figure stands beside it for a few moments and then comes and stands alongside my door. Oh no, please no. Please just stay there whilst my screen clears. Nope, my luck is all to crap this night - tap tap on the window. To this day I do not know why I opened the door instead of winding down the window, but that is what I did - and the interior light came on, so i’m properly on view now. Skirt showing the top of my holdups, red tipped fingers on the steering wheel, bright red lippy, earrings, bangles, false boobies straining against my top - he can see it all. I just wanted to die 😞 And the brain just kind of gave up, switched into autopilot and my mouth said “hi, can I help you”.And he lowered his pants, held his cock out for me and said “I’m sure you can” Just like that, no small talk, no “well actually, I was wondering…” Just. Held. His. Cock.Out!

Oh hell, how do I get out of this? What I wanted to say and do was “no thanks, not into guys at all” and drive off, but the slut buried inside decided to take control of the motor functions and took his cock, slowly stroking it and she pulled him toward me and then wrapped my lips around it, and I’m totally repulsed by what is happening, but also wondering what it will taste like. Tastes good said the inner slut, and I could feel the gurl who just wanted to be with gurls fading into the background. I let go of his cock and told him to get into the back of the car, followed him in and slut just came out. I stroked his cock and balls, I took him into my mouth, determined to make my first BJ the best he ever had. He was moaning and writhing as I sucked and licked him and I could feel him starting to tense. Me surfaced for a moment and decided that this was far enough, do not want him to cum in my mouth!

The slut quickly took over again however and actually deep throated him and feeling him start to twitch, really went for it!. He quickly pulled my head up and away and announced that he wanted my pussy! Whoa, stop right there - top gurl resurfaced hella quick - Nuh uh, not happening, no cocks in there thank you! Yes, I’ve played with a dildo, but never ever really wanted a cock, “cos that would mean I was........??? 😮

But slut was still in control of motor functions though and I just heard myself say “oh yes please baby, here’s a condom” as she opened her clutch and grabbed one, tearing it open and unrolling it over his throbbing cock. NO, NO, NO! those condoms are for me to use, cried a faint voice inside.She got out, walked around to the offside of the car, lubed her pussy, lubed the condom covered cock, bent over and grabbed the door handle for support, spread her legs wide, threw her mini skirt over her back and waggled her bum in invitation. Oh god, the slut is me!

And that is the story of how Sammie’s cherry very unintentionally got popped, with her moaning like a bitch in heat, pushing back on the door to get him deeper inside, and reaching back between her spread legs to fondle his balls.

I drove home literally shaking from what had happened, mind reeling from the realisation of what I had done and from the growing knowledge that I had actually liked it. 

Lying in bed that night I found it hard to sleep, my pussy was still slippery with lube and unfamiliar thoughts were flying around in my head.I realised that despite my thoughts and insistence of being top only, all of my dressing like a tart and flashing in lay-bys had simply been the expression of suppressed desire.

As I slowly came to this conclusion, it was as though I could suddenly see clearly. I wanted to be a girl, I wanted to be a slut. I relished the thought of getting dressed again, with a clear purpose in mind this time.

Needless to say that wasn’t the last visit I made to that lay-by.

And my missing date from that night? - Actually texted later to apologise and we met two nights after.

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