Sorry, I just don't. I think you have to care about the person you are intimate with. For at Sub/Dom world it is a mutual respect that one says they are willing to be pushed to their limit, while the other says, I will take you no further than you are willing and ready to experience. I am not deep into that but I like the sentiment.
What I need is a friend, who doesn't mind getting flirtatious and could be a lover from time to time. It has to be a long term friendship, even if the sex ends or never happens. Connection is very sexy. Knowing a person, how their body works and how to meet their sexual expectations is a wonderful thing. But that is not as easy to find.
Being married and considering a polyamorous life is a lot like knowing you and your partner can make it but both want something more. Anyway, that's me today. A guy looking for a friend to share many benefits with. Press like if you agree.
