"A thousand eyes looking at me
But yours is the look that goes right through me and I
Cannot Hide from your stare
Should I let you in - do I dare"
All hail to my pre-valentine blog entry. The love bug is prevalent and it has managed to infect my unsuspecting self. Ahhhh February. The time of the month when hopeful romantics emerge with twinkling eyes and erratically beating hearts. It's when single folks like me are hyper aware of our status and those with significant others either take this occasion for granted or step up the ante.
Love is interpreted in different ways, size, shape and form. The Beatles sang about how limitless undying love still can't change their world. As it should not. But they still croon about its wonder across the universe. Bob Marley said that no matter how you treat him, man will never be satisfied. Yet he still asks if you could be loved.
Personally, I've always believed that love is a choice. Like everything that dictates our path in life, we hold the key to our hearts. It's just a matter of choosing who to hand it over for safekeeping. The notion of limiting yourself to just one great love is absurd. You are allowed to love and love and love as many times as you can take it! It's too big of an emotion to hold in and keep to yourself. Love, they say, is for the bold and the fearless. But dayummmm. Call me a freaking coward because it scares the bejesus outta me too. It scares me because beautiful as love is, it has the ability to destroy a sane person until they're down on their knees begging for the pain to cease. I have a weird penchant of loving too hard. Which brings us back full circle to my mantra to choose wisely.
But then again, sometimes we don't get to choose. Sometimes, love chooses us. No matter how much you overthink things, it all boils down to certain components that shoves circumstances down our faces. And that, my friends, is where connection comes in. That instant spark of je ne sais quoi that hits you full throttle. It makes us believe in irrational explanations like fate and destiny. But you know what? Fuck it. Fuck that. Chronic fretting will take away that special moment and taint it with unwelcome darkness. To those who find themselves resonating with my ramblings, here's my unsolicited advice: Love should be deliberate. Love should be patient and kind and enduring. Love only if you can take the pain and the sacrifices that comes along with it. Love should be able to conquer the other person's darkness so you can stand by your choices and refuse to jump ship when it's the easiest and most obvious recourse. Love in the moment. Love hard. Love in such a way that the person you love feels free. Love until you purge it out and you're sick of it. Love until the butterflies bring along the whole fucking zoo and jungle. Love until you're whole. Love like you've never been broken or damaged. Just love. 💕
"Suddenly in my life
There's something that's got me mystified and I
Cannot fight it but I can try
To keep the wonder of it alive"
