Steampunk and Masochism

When I have a moment to myself without the hassle of other
people around I make myself a cup of coffee and grab some shortbread biscuits
and log into the computer to see what would interest my female side.

 

Today I did exactly that this afternoon and found myself on
a website that I visit a lot but today I was browsing women's clothing and
accessories.  You see, I have a love for
the Gothic style and I find the clothes and accessories that are labelled "steampunk"
adorable.  So today I spent the afternoon
browsing on line such.  I found a lovely
Victorian type miniskirt with ruffles, a sleeveless body hugging red blouse
with high neck and some to die for stockings to go with them.  I also purchased a dog collar.  Not for the dog but me. 

 

You see my submissiveness is completely intertwined with my
femininity.  I subscribe to the BDSM lifestyle
and I am in the process of developing a female personality.  So the fact that the two aspects should
become one is not surprising.  Although I
hasten to add that this is not a reflection on the female gender or woman's
rights.  It is simply my predeliction (my
femininity is born from a masculine personality).  And within that lifestyle I am a masochist.  I have yet to ascertain my boundaries but
look forward to doing so.  I hasten to add
that my love of pain is not a love of pain per se.  I avoid going to the dentist as much as the
next person as it is painful and hurts. 
It is only within a particular context that is erotically charged that I
find I can get intense pleasure at the same time as feeling the pain.  It is hard to describe it but it becomes an
addictive release for me.  But the most
important aspect is the after-care after a scene as this can be very emotional
for the submissive and it is important to pay as much attention to me then as
during the domination.

 

And so, I build my wardrobe and my toys awaiting to
experience new pleasures from new friends.

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