A primer for dealing with Mixed Couples

This will be a long post, if Admin will even allow it to be posted. They have killed some of our blog posts in the past.


We want to make sure that before you read this, you understand its not meant to be negative, but informative. A clash of cultures, a clash of demographics, a clash of education and a clash ages. Thats not to say there aren't great exceptions to everything we will say and everything we have experienced.


Mixed couples are often very different than pure Asian couples and singles. That western mix was raised and exposed to a culture very different than what Asians are exposed to. With that being said its not uncommon for them to look for something a bit more open and stimulating to the mind in order to break the ice. Our partners are that way as well, by osmosis they absorb our cultural views and nuances. We don't speak for everyone, but by experience we know that some of our thoughts are echoed by many.


We are an educated, non drug using, clean and sane mixed couple. We don't need to be intoxicated to have fun, but we do enjoy a few drinks. What we have found is that the filipino swing scene is terribly lacking. Mike has been in the lifestyle for over 25 years in both the USA and EU. Christine has been in the lifestyle 3 years only in Manila.


First we should say that any form of organized communication for swingers is going to have its flaws and its going to have its flakes. We have been on swinger sites that are far more robust than this, and they all share those common traits. You cant blame the site. In fact the site gets far less credit than it should. It works and it is very seldom down.


We have a very complete Profile. Our Profile is considerably more complete than most who contact us. That being said it really does no good. Last month ( August ) we looked at each reply we got, each friend request we got and totaled them up. Then we looked at the specifications in our profile that would exclude us from being interested in that person. Be it a lack of pictures, no pictures, an automated message asking for more pictures, out of town, out of country, lack of reviews or profiles that make no sense at all. 93 percent of the inquires just don't measure up.


The other day we had a friends request from a profile that was out of town but close, and they were another couple. We very nicely sent them a message and said thanks, however we do not accpet profiles as friends unless we know them or they have reviews. We received a nasty little reply calling us stuck up essentially. And asking why didn't we say so in our profile. We tried to respond by saying we were sorry but we simply cant put every little detail in our profile as it is already too long. What we wanted to say was why should you be one of our friends? You have never said a word to us, you didn't send us a message to introduce yourself, you just hit the plus friend button. We were nice enough to respond and waste our time being nice about it. Alas we could not tell them the nice version or the not so nice version as they went ahead and blacklisted us, no great loss I am sure.


So let us now begin. Please and we ask nicely, please, fix your automated messages. We look at profiles and have no interest in most, yet we get automated responses that say we see your interested in us, please send more pictures. We get automated messages saying all kinds of crap like the one that comes with the site that says i am admiring your profile and would you send me more pictures. We simply ignore those now.


Single guys, please if you are not what we are looking for, don't bother us. We know you are desperate and sending the same message to everyone. There is a reason we are looking for a third wheel and it has nothing to do with how horny YOU are. Does your profile tell us anything about you, do you have reviews, do you even have more than two pictures? Don't ask us for our phone number, we just aren't going to give that out to some single guy to have him drunk dial us at 4 in the morning. We value our privacy. Here more than in any other place we have played, it is simply crazy that single guys don't get that they are in the minority of being desirable. You have to play harder, try harder and impress more. And I am not talking about impressing just mixed couples more. There are a great number of non mixed couples on here that are professional, real and have higher standards. The world is changing and some of you are dinosaurs, soon to be extinct.


Couples, its so hard to distinguish the minority of real couples from the scams or wanna be couples. There are a number of GREAT couples on here. Many that are way out of our league. We just admit it, smile and keep looking. However there are a huge number of couple profiles on here that are as the old saying in America goes, " it does not matter how much lipstick you put on a pig, its still a pig ". And a fake profile no matter how good looking, is a fake profile. Couples distinguish themselves by attending meet and greets. Its the absolute safest way with no commitment to become known as an actual couple. Don't have reviews like most fake profiles, then go to a meet and greet. Would you rather selectively mail people who interest you....then send a mail with substance. Make us interested, tell us why your interested, tell us exactly what your looking for and what your limitations are. And for god sakes if we have more pictures in our profile than you do, don't ask for more. Thats a sure sign your a single guy sitting at home trying to rub one off.


Part 2 will cover meet and greets both group and individual, long distance arrangements, boundaries, and hygiene as if it needed to be covered.

Mike and Christine

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