I have spent far too much time this week trawling though the blog pages and the consequence is me somehow feeling compelled to write about genitals. Yes, genitals! Quite a surprise for an adult sex site, I know.
For the record, I dislike using the words genitals, penis or vagina. They sound so clinical and let’s be honest, there’s nothing fun about a visit to the clinic. I much prefer 'cock and fanny' as I find them to be such classy and lady-like words to use.
Anyway, after reading various blogs and comments, many of which are extremely well written, it suddenly occurred to me how many different ways we all refer to our ‘bits and pieces’.
We seem to spend a lot of time thinking, talking and writing about friendships, intimacy and sex. Our ‘bits and pieces’, what we think of them and what we’d like to do with them is frequently on the agenda yet we don’t seem to be able to agree on a common name for them.
Names I found this morning:
For the boys - cock, lovestick, joystick, manstick, hammer, rammer, limp stick, spanner, weapon, handle, sissy stick, pleasure stick, stilton stick, dick, one-eyed Bob, meat puppet, womb ferret (WTF!), junk.
For the girls - fanny, vajayjay, pussy, fish pie, luvchute, wet place, love tunnel, pleasure place, bush, crease, crack, front bum, yoni, box, cookie, flower, cunt (so dislike that word!), bits and pieces (my contribution).
I think language is a powerful tool. Amongst other things, it shapes our perception of others and how we feel about ourselves. Perhaps there is an absence in our conversations of names that are neither clinical, offensive, crude, shy, misandristic* or misogynistic?
So, what’s in a name and is it important? Do you have a preference? Can we take offence to how others refer to our bits and pieces?
Luv2xx
*Complaints on a postcard if this isn't a real word or spelt incorrectly
10:34 am Wednesday, 31st July, 2013
I agree Kinky and it sound a bit dangerous for one-eyed Bob to be going into a dark love tunnel. He may well bump his head if he's not careful. |
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11:03 am Wednesday, 31st July, 2013
@Lilith Strangely enough I didn't come across the word 'prick' this morning.
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11:04 am Wednesday, 31st July, 2013
*I thought twice |
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11:20 am Wednesday, 31st July, 2013
I've always had probs with "cunt": I keep getting flashbacks to the time I got beaten up by Arsenal supporters as a teenager. I can never forget that ghastly cockney accent as their fists descended: "'Ere....wot team ja sappoat, kant??" |
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1:04 pm Wednesday, 31st July, 2013
Kinky: Most women in Japan refer to their equipment as "manko" (sometimes with the honorific prefix "o-": "o-manko", which I suppose would translate as "the esteemed or honourable pussy" (lol)). But I do agree that pussies give so much pleasure, they deserve to be venerated :-) |
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1:06 pm Wednesday, 31st July, 2013
FA: Nobody seems to have touched on "pecker" yet. Is that largely US usage? |
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1:26 pm Wednesday, 31st July, 2013
There's one of those makes a noise outside my bedroom window here about 5 am every day. He's called "woody". Hey wait a minute.....isn't that another name for "dick"?? |
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2:33 pm Wednesday, 31st July, 2013
Agreed! Skebbie makes my day with "Esteemed and Honorable Pussy"! |
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2:37 pm Wednesday, 31st July, 2013
I won't foul my mouth by repeating some of the less refined phrases I know to describe a ladies 'part'... |
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3:12 pm Wednesday, 31st July, 2013
Stacey: Re. "Petal" and "Tuppence". Reminds me of when I was a kid and bodily toilet functions were referred to as "No. 1" and "No. 2" for liquids and solids respectively :-) Happily, I grew out of that, though - and religion :-) |
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3:44 pm Wednesday, 31st July, 2013
"Up with cunt!" :-D |
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12:28 am Thursday, 1st August, 2013
Lilith: OK, we all get the picture: you're a "cunt mujahideen" :-) |
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12:31 am Thursday, 1st August, 2013
Roslyn: There is nothing "wobbly" about Dixon......(ahem....!) :-) |
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2:56 am Thursday, 1st August, 2013
Lilith: It's true what you say about misogynistic history, though. It all started with "bloody Eve just *had* to go and pick that fucking apple, didn't she? The dumb cow." |
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8:03 am Thursday, 1st August, 2013
@Lilith - your comments are a joy to read pmsl.
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9:15 am Thursday, 1st August, 2013
Lilith: This isn't meant to be a suck-up, but I always considered women to be the better of the two sexes, which is why I generally prefer their company to men, who are invariably trying to score points off each other. |
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9:27 am Thursday, 1st August, 2013
Skebbie, very wise. I could tell you are a clever guy.
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9:43 am Thursday, 1st August, 2013
right then where to start ...lol..at the beginning .well the whats in a name thing .firstly its only a name dont take it seriously , take mine its a name couldnt think of another as not that bright ...some have names that they think make them sound erm good like ohiavabig willy 46 or misssexygodamsohot ..not .now the big one what to call a ladies lovetunnel or spunk hole as one layd called it ..and she was posh lol .thats another story ..to me depends on the lady who you are with some like to be treated like whores and called names .so they like to use the word cunt..or there is the ones who like to be made love to teased and pleased and then filled but not saying which word to call it ..personally it all depends on the person your fucking or shagging or emptying on or what ever we call it at the time ..right rant over who is up for their cunt to be fucked lol |
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9:53 am Thursday, 1st August, 2013
@Farmboy, when you put it like that, erm ....... ME!! But alas, I have butterfly cakes to bake.
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11:08 am Thursday, 1st August, 2013
Farmboy, she's deadly serious and that's an offer you can't refuse.
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11:52 am Thursday, 1st August, 2013
BTG: I wondered where you'd got to the last 24 hours. Obviously a lot of research went into that post. |
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11:58 am Thursday, 1st August, 2013
Lilith: "Have her scrubbed and brought to my tent !" just sprang to mind when I read your last but one post :-) |
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12:51 pm Thursday, 1st August, 2013
BTG - flying IPads? Be afraid, be very afraid ... |
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2:36 pm Thursday, 1st August, 2013
I don't think my local Fish 'n Chip shop in Yorks has that on the menu. |
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6:36 am Friday, 2nd August, 2013
This blog is hilarious. |
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9:31 am Friday, 2nd August, 2013
I'm suddenly reminded of a time a few years ago when I was called a twat-faced cunt by one of my staff. Poor guy, I was giving him his P45 and having him escorted off the premises at the time.
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9:53 am Friday, 2nd August, 2013
Wellywanking? Wow!! Have visions of a realy huge willy the size of a wellyboot.
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7:13 pm Friday, 2nd August, 2013
Mmm my husband (will one day be ex?) is a bit of a wellywank, but I don't say that in the affectionate way you call your friend. |
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12:14 am Saturday, 3rd August, 2013
Oops, sorry Oliver, too late. Now let me count those corks ... |
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7:14 am Saturday, 3rd August, 2013
Not so classy if you saw me with a corkscrew ... lethal |
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9:59 am Saturday, 3rd August, 2013
Oh dear, take it from me, wine, beer or any other alcoholic beverage never mixes well with the blog pages or chatroom. (she says with a slight hangover)
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11:38 am Saturday, 3rd August, 2013
Hey Olivers ... xxx |
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3:07 pm Saturday, 3rd August, 2013
A scholarly dissertation on the varying words, soubriqueta and euphemisms for naughty bits. |
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5:53 pm Saturday, 3rd August, 2013
Fetch xx. I have never heard of quim. This site is such an education :-) Googled it for more info ... |
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9:51 pm Saturday, 3rd August, 2013
" Quim " is also used in an old rugby song about Roedean Girl's Public School.(Princess Anne is numbered among the alumni.) |
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11:38 pm Saturday, 3rd August, 2013
Good idea Betelgeuse. |
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1:06 am Sunday, 4th August, 2013
"Well of all the world's diseases....." Yes I remember it with fondness :-) |
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6:21 am Sunday, 4th August, 2013
A good idea to start a blog about Rugby songs. Unfortunately, the repertoire is so large,it would take an inordinate length of time to compile the complete song book.The other problem is that many of the songs require actions so a video would be needed also. |
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1:51 pm Friday, 16th August, 2013
just call them bits and pieces- that's a good idea.
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2:11 pm Friday, 16th August, 2013
Wasn't that the title of a 60s single by Manfred Mann ?? :-) |
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2:40 pm Friday, 16th August, 2013
@Skebbie - haha |
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3:08 pm Friday, 16th August, 2013
Luv2: Yes it lends itself admirably to the subject matter, does it not? :-) Never mind my totem pole: I think the Mighty Quim is worthy of worship. |
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6:51 am Monday, 19th August, 2013
@BBW Just picked up your comment that BTG has left and notice he has deleted his profile. That is a shame :-( |
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8:24 am Monday, 19th August, 2013
Oh really? That's a shame. Well I'm still waiting for him to claim his beer if he's passing through. |
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10:21 am Sunday, 3rd November, 2013
Apologies in advance if this puts you off your breakfast, but I feel the need to share this message found in my inbox: |
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2:16 pm Sunday, 3rd November, 2013
He is a Welsh member so rules that theory out DJ. |
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2:59 pm Sunday, 3rd November, 2013
Think he may have been rather excited and typing with one hand Luv2 ..... Ooops mistakes will happen!
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3:19 pm Sunday, 3rd November, 2013
Mayonnaise drain is evocative for all the wrong reasons. I wonder in what other areas of life he might make well intentioned faux pas? |
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5:33 pm Sunday, 3rd November, 2013
I seem to remember from somewhere in the mucky mess laughingly called My Mind that the word quim came from a V shaped defensive device on a castle or other fortification. The entrance was at the end of the V and presumably that gave rise to the other useage of the word. Cwm also appears as a geological shape relating to V shaped valleys.
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7:06 pm Sunday, 3rd November, 2013
I will never, ever be able to enjoy a tuna and mayo sandwich again. |
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8:49 pm Sunday, 3rd November, 2013
Macbloke, I quite like willy. I know, that sounds wrong, but you know what I mean. |