Home > Articles > Explore New Kinks & Find Your Compatible Kinkster

Explore New Kinks & Find Your Compatible Kinkster

Delving into the realm of kinks and looking for the right person to explore with? Don’t quite know where to start? We understand! There really is so much out there that the first step may feel a little overwhelming… You want someone who shares your unique sexual tastes, someone that you enjoy spending time with, and someone who also likes calling you a dirty little slut from time to time (if that's the sort of thing you're into!).

So, to help guide you on your path to finding the perfect blend of kinky and acceptable mate-material, we’ve put together some spanktastic pointers that will have you sorted (and satisfied) in no time. ??

Firstly, what does ‘kink’ really mean?

A ‘kink’ is a broad term that includes a variety of sexual interests, behaviors, preferences, and fantasies that are thought to be ‘outside of the mainstream’. Essentially - no vanilla!

It’s great to be a beginner!

Before you go jumping in at the deep end of intense fetish play, make sure you know what you’re getting yourself into, and what you want to get into. As a beginner, the world is your oyster, but there are a dizzying array of sub-fetishes out there which may leave you unsure about which path to take.

Are you a meticulous master, or a timid submissive? Could you ‘switch’ and be a bit of both? You don’t have to decide and commit to all this straight away - or ever! Take it slow and move forward with what feels right for you - there are tons of kinky people out there who are more than happy to experiment.

Get to know some of your own kinks first!

What are your fetishes? Do you already crave to be in control, or to be controlled? Do you know your limits yet? Are you willing to be whipped, or would a firm but gentle spank from a hand be enough to drive you wild? These are all questions you’re likely going to encounter from a potential new playmate when first getting to know each other, so why not start by experimenting on your own beforehand?

Indulge yourself in some racy research! There’s an endless amount of free content out there that’ll fill you in - from online forums, videos, literature, podcasts, blogs - whatever you like best! This will give you a much better idea about whether you’re going to be sexually compatible with someone you meet. ??

Get involved in your kinky community

Online and offline, there are plenty of options for you! You can locate like-minded, kinky people in seconds with a simple internet search. Being a site dedicated to kinks and BDSM dating, you’ll never be short of fellow kinksters here!

Boost your chances of finding a suitable playmate by adding as much detail about what you’re looking for in a playmate as you’re comfortable with to your profile! This will help steer you towards people with the same kinks and interests. Take advantage of the community areas of the site to build your network, and check out the calendar for real-life events posted by members.

Remember, not everyone you meet here has to be your next playmate to be a great kinky connection. You’ll find plenty of new and experienced people willing to show you the ropes, chat all things kink, and support you on your exciting sexual journey.

Talk and explore with the new people you encounter

When you're meeting kinky new people, keep your mind open and prepare to meet a wild variety of people who are into all sorts of things - some things you may never have even thought of! This is a no-judgement community, where building authentic relationships will lead you to make even more contacts - and with that comes further opportunities to explore your own identity, and to meet people to play with.

Everyone here started somewhere - no matter how experienced they are now! We’re all here because we’re into similar things, so never be afraid to ask for guidance as you explore your kinks and fetishes.

Don't be discouraged by people you’re not interested in!

Not everybody is for everybody - and that’s absolutely ok! When it comes to partnering up online, simply take a firm but respectful stance against any unwanted messages, photos, or requests from anyone. Whatever you do, nobody should stop your fun. ?

Exploring your raunchy kinks is all about you, and there are far more genuine individuals open to guiding you through it. Surround yourself with the people you really connect with, keep that positive attitude, and you’re sure to find a perfect playmate. Trust us on this - we see these kinky connections happening every day!

Always be direct about your expectations

When it comes to initiating some naughty play time, keep all your negotiations honest and clear. Be sure that full consent is given by everyone involved - talk about your limits, safewords, aftercare, and any relevant medical information.

Don’t hesitate in rejecting playtime with someone if negotiations aren’t exactly what you’re comfortable with. There will always be someone else out there who will be totally on the same page as you.

Choose a safe location to meet for the first time

This one is key! If it’s your first IRL (in real life) meeting with someone you’ve met online, try to arrange it somewhere public like a coffee shop or a bar - with lots of people and a relaxed vibe. This will allow you to work out whether you want to take it further.

If you want to skip that stage and meet with the plan to get kinky together already, how about checking out your local kink clubs or events? These venues are safe spaces to play, with people there to ensure your safety. If you can’t access these clubs/events, there may be some home parties hosted by our members close to your location!

However, if you do decide to meet up with someone alone, you should always let a friend / someone else know where you’re going, and who you’re meeting with. ?

Finally, don’t overthink - this is your fun!

Experiencing new sensations and exploring our identities is what being human is all about, isn’t it? Discover what you love doing and ultimately, discover what feels great to you! Get to know yourself as part of the incredible kinky community, full of people ready to compliment your kinks and have a fantastically naughty time with you.

Do you have a kink you’re craving to explore? Have you met your ultimate kinky playmate and want to share advice for anyone else looking to do the same? Let us know in the comments below - we love your stories! ?? ??


Hi anyone there 


I'm a sub I have always dreamed of being one for a couple or group. Don't really know how to find dominates that im glad to see this article. Help please

im a fully 100% submissive slut ,cum dump boy!

Fucking wife  in presence of husband

I am looking for doggers,BDSM I want o be the master,love the idea of cuckolding and would also like to be in the swinging scene as a single male I want to bang a mans wife  in front of him

You have my attention from Greenville, Pa.

A Dom by nature so only interested in female sub but restricted travel wise so very limited possibilty of meets!

I intrested in couple swaps, for fill new excitement in life, I want start a local swaps group by the help couples , so that I agree with u .

Looking for a lady who would like t stretch my balls.

Hi we are from kota rajasthan and we like to explore 


Hi I’m. Very available ready and eager let’s play micc

like to meet you              rich

am very submissive sissy  into dominant male who likes to administer spankings and use the cane on  me  turns me on 

Hi love outdoor fun public sex where can we meet get in touch with me 


Im all ready

Hi ,Im you here and live in port Macquarie i would like to join a group in my  area for some fun .im experimenting with crossdressing and I'm enjoying it 
I would love to have a CD take me as her girl or pegged by a woman. Im open  minded to trying bondage. Anyone in my area

Only advice I'd give is garden centres are a better place for a first meet than a cafe. OK, so do your greeting in the on site cafe. But if it seems like your getting somewhere you can get up and go for a stroll around without compromising safety. I've always found discussing anal sex or fisting is inhibited by the old dear sitting behind you choking on their garibaldi as they listen in. 

Hi there yes I would be absolutely interested and pursuing my fantasies hopefully I will find the right people to do this very outgoing guy open minded and a lot of fun

I will find right partner 

Willing to try my fantasies with miss right and all of them

Looking for nsa fwb and cuckolds from hy

Oh...i love big SISSIES ! MORE OF everything TO suck !

Lets come im the master????????????????

My Naughty un-pegged tight Sluts boi Arse wants to lose its pegging virginity whilst being tugged off and filmed by a lady.  Any lady out there who can Ass-ist me with this Please 

im so ready

Erotic sex

Public, bdsm, swingers,  outdoor fun , exhibitionists, erotica. 

Whats good everyone? I got an obscession with munching pussy while finger bangin, I like to do just that at her leisure. I love getting head to but only if your not scraping. Can I get a clean girl to chow on for hours. No BS

I am ready to try anything

Looking for cockhold couples. That want a BBC in control. If that's you. Lets talk

Hi, Any Mistress from Kolkata Wish to Control me?

I want a hard spankings

I need a local couple/ lady to full fill my destiny.

Super helpful. Tx.

Great article. In addition I'd like to add, as someone who has been in the fetish scene for 20 years + when you do find that someone, so many times they have lied, or just fulfilling an online fantasy, and that adds to the difficulty, as genuine people get tired of being let down.
So if you are genuine, you do really need to get involved locally.


I have been cross Dressing sissy for,39 years

Hi I'm a DOM Male and I'm looking for a SUB Female who is into B&D and loves to be Spanked Hard She should be between 21-40 SWF who is N D,NS and DDF and who lives here in Columbus Ohio

Any mistress want to control me pls pm 
Looking in Bangalore

I'm a white male good-looking and recently turned submissive and liking to dress up as a girl also a desire to be dealt with like one as well in the presence of or by the female??


I want to tey

I am a sub male and been into cuckoldry pasy 6 yrs......

I am a white male love to cross dressing want to be collared and cock caged i want to be a submissive male

Iam not us thar in india

How does one locate a fetish club? I have never done my own research, since my friend was the one who lead me to this lifestyle. Now that I no longer have him as a Dom, I am at a lost. I want a safe place to meet others. 

When I became a mistress in 1990s I was surprised to find that there was an unlimited supply of people I could whip their asses like bitches. So when the situation becomes normal again I will get the riding crop, the whip, and the cane out again to redden arse. If you present your arse to me don't expect me to go easy on you, I want your tears.