12:08 pm Tuesday, 5th November, 2019
Sex is great, it can make every inch of your body feel incredible, but sometimes you can find it mentally challenging to get in the mood to kick start the fire altogether.
Stress has a huge impact on our sex lives. It changes everything from the initial desire to have sex, through to arousal and ultimately the ability to orgasm. For most people, sex negatively impacts all these things.
So how can you reduce the impacts of stress on your sex drive?
Scientifically speaking, nighttime is the worst time to have sex. Cortisol (the stress hormone) in both men and women, is at its peak during the deepest darkest hours, although more so in women than men. An entire day's worth of stress has been building to this point, and now you're about as stressed as you're going to be. This stress reduces your ability to utilise dopamine and nitric oxide, which are both required for arousal and ultimately orgasm.
While cortisol may be at its peak, testosterone is at it's lowest, creating the ultimate down and dirty downer...not good! Testosterone is what's needed for stamina, erections and the drive to initiate sexy time.
It's hard to get all worked up when you have no energy to work up anymore, right? So, when is the best time? Well, research shows that the morning is the best time to get frisky between the sheets, why? Because as you've slept your body have replenished all your kinky chemicals, ready to start the day in the best way possible.
One of the best ways to make sure you don't fall into a sex slump is to keep yourself in good health.
Stress can negatively impact your metabolism, which makes you gain weight, feel sluggish and generally feel bad about your body, leaving you feeling the opposite of the kinky sex machine within. When stress takes over your body, you don't want to exercise, this, in turn, creates more tension, lowers our ability to deal with it, and kicks the cycle over again.
On the other hand, sex decreases cortisol levels and also helps in a bunch of different ways. It also produces dopamine which can help combat depression, which often either contributes to or is a result of stress. As well, oxytocin released during sex actually has repetitive properties that help fix the physical damage to our systems caused by high-stress levels.
Here's where it gets complicated. For 90% of the population, stress decreases desire. However, for most people, sex decreases stress. It's one frustrating cycle.
We see in a lot of tv shows and movies that sex is spontaneous and passionate, but the truth is, the stresses of everyday life can take over the thoughts of stripping off and going to pound town together.
While your mind might feel like it is preoccupied elsewhere and sex is off the cards, it doesn't mean that once you get into it, you won't be screaming for more! Setting an exact day or even a time during the day to have sex can add pressure to an already jam-packed schedule. Instead, make it a priority to give one another some attention throughout the day, a kinky text to let them know you're thinking of them or a passionate kiss when you pass by each other. Small moments of affection can create a big surge in your sexual desire.
So, there you have it. Three ways to limit the negative impacts of stress on your sex life. How does your stress levels affect your sex drive? Let us know in the comments below.