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Conservative wife. How do you ease her into soft swapping?

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This thought has been in my mind for a long time. and thanks much to this site. i have found like minded people who can share their intimacies with me. unfortunately, wify thinks im way too over the starboard bow on this and i would like to ask you. how did you get your semi-conservative partners into this. she even said she'll leave me for it. and i guess the game is on. how do you ease her into it. we've moved on and this was the same thing she said when i wanted to load her behind...i'd really appreciate it if you could share decent advice? Thanks and a great day to all. :)

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RE:Conservative wife. How do you ease her into soft swapping?

Try watching some porn first, then slowly open up her mind...

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reply

Yes, we are actually avid fans of porn. and, we have done anal once in a while. but, she says there is no way she would want to jump in on the nudie wagon. well, i guess i just need to find the right couple to do it with.

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social

try looking out for a local social to you, least this way you can meet up with others knowing sex isn't on the cards but mix with similar members - if you can't find one, why not set up one yourself...Socials are not parties

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RE:reply

I think most of the Filipino couples here in this site are in the same situation you are in now. I doubt there are many so called "swingers" in the Philippines. LIke what i said to you, perhaps our women value the sanctity of marriage more than other nationalities. Maybe our religious background also comes in to play. It is exciting to think about it...having the wife get touched by another man and all....but it takes a lot of maturity and guts to do. As for me, It is very difficult to convince the wife enjoy our sex life with others....outside the normal routine. Women really perceive sex differently unlike us men. I must admit that until now, the wife does not agree to the idea of soft swap, same room, etc. but she does entertain it when we have sex or when she is about to reach orgasm. I am not sure if it will only be a fantasy for us but I hope we get the chance to have same room sex with another couple just for the sake of experience.

I will keep on trying until I find the right couple. U do that too.

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admission

Well, i truly find your wife hot. i must admit im also a victim of her beautiful smile.

We have group dates lined up and just maybe one of these would trigger an erotic stimulation. one couple here even said that they have met alot of other couples and yet never had the chance to perform any group sex together and mostly socialize with a cup of coffee in their hands. and i have had the honor of speaking with another who says that they have had the opportunity to soft swap once. how i envy his emotional fortitude.

i was in the supermarket awhile ago then i had the realization that i never wanted to see another man touch my wife and simply enjoy the voyeur moment and watch another couple perform live sex infront of us. although it would be great to see myself join them. i just dont want my wife to experience the same emotional hindrance as i and would also love to see my wife with another woman instead. it would be a blast! a spurt of a blast!

we have agreed on this and she even agrees to it. hope to see my wife perform with your wife somedday. :)

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add

let me just add that most women in our country simply act differently. they respond more positively to courtship and kindness. you become sweet to them and they feel emotionally secure with you then they give you what you want. i believe its simply not a religious belief. but, the method in which to get them to bed. they are used to being flirted and courted with first rather than jump into bed with a total stranger. and that, for me is emotionally hard to take since im the jealous kind. i dont want to see text messages and calls from the 'other' guy that says 'i love you baby.' or 'i really want to have you tonight.'. it just drives me crazy...but, would rather get turned on when another woman says the same sweet things to her. knowing that the 'other' woman can give pleasure to the both of us. there is a couple whom consented to this. same room + lesbian sex only. no soft swapping and swinging either. well, i guess i just have to wait and see what happens then.

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RE:Conservative wife. How do you ease her into soft swapping?

There more people think the more they Overthink which leads them to doubts. Stop with the thinking and just do it. Make a list of your rules, find a couple that agrees with your rules, meet up at the place and have just have fun with it -be sure not to break/change the rules when you already started to avoid trust issues, you can always say no/stop when there/before start/middle of it/etc. Skip the coffee/alcohol(whatever) it will just make you overthink things again.

Just thinking out loud, thou many would not agree with the common conventionalism and all.
BUT, let me ask- is there anything conventional with Swinging in whatever form?

As Juan Flavier and "Nike" said: "just do it"

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looking for adult sex talk and play tonight with anyone in north west

up for some fun tonight

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Reply

I see your point curiouzcouple. however, there is still one thing that still remains conventional. your partner for the swing. in my case, my conservative wife. if i do not listen to her and just take her to a swing party all of a sudden. who is to blame for her emotional outburst? it would end up sour for the other couple and for me as well. losing face and eventually may end up with a broken marriage. so, i guess it takes time and effort to convince her and just maybe she'll begin to realize and enjoy it someday. shes changed the porn videos that she watches from lesbo to MFF threesomes. i do hope this is a good sign and then we may end up with a same room experience and a nice full blown lesbian sex scene starring my wife after all. but, for now she says that she has to be either high on something or really drunk on alcohol to make her do it. for me, nothing beats freewill and if youre really into it then why not jump right in? i guess we just simply need to find the right ones to share something this intimacy with.
and like all marriages are, opposites attract. i love my wife more than ever. and, i'll love her and respect her till the day i die. if she says it isnt so. then so be it. then cross my fingers behind my back all the time hope she changes her mind. :)

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RE:Reply

If your wife doesn't want to swing, do not force her. Maybe you should let her read your blogs and posts so that she knows how badly you want it. Maybe then she will change her mind. Just my 2 cents.

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reply

No. i dont want it that badly. i just like to go and try a few things at this age. but, im not really hardcore into it. and if it doesnt really happen then i dont really mind. its for like minded couples that really are into swinging. im just glad that i have her. thats all. i can always imagine those things in my mind and will just envy the guys here whos done it. anyways, they share there realities with my fantasy through the videos and images. for me, that is good enough. :)

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re

My girlfriend is seasonal about it. Sometimes she's up for it 100% and sometimes 0%. Me too, but more often than not, it's round about a hundred.
Of course everyone is different (that's why we wanna swing, right??) but some couples only can talk about it and never do it. It isn't easy the 1st time for sure. At least, it wasn't for me.
Anyway, I was able to convince my partner before we got into a relationship. I explained my personal desires and she understood, accepted, and when her mood is 'right', she enjoys too!

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RE:RE:Reply

I agree with seemyangel. All im saying is maybe let her know how you really feel about it and if for that moment she agrees, dont counter it, dont make her over think there after. If at a moment she agrees then go for it, but never force her ;)

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RE:RE:RE:Reply

Im stumped on this one ? maybe buy her a handbag :)

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New to this help

Hi all am so new to this x have done a threesome before but never been on chat room x me and my husband are up for threesome

RE:Conservative wife. How do you ease her into soft swapping?

Only based on guesswork i would say the fear to her is overwhelming, hence putting such a high price on it (i.e. saying the relationship is worth ending rather then doing it/discussing it). The goal would be to eleviate that fear and make it an acceptable proposition and the only way i know to do that is to ask why she doesn't wish to and have an open discussion about it. Find out what it is that worries her and see if that can be dealt with. Worst comes to worst you'll understand exactly why she doesn't want to and it will no longer be an issue. Good luck!

Are you ready for it?

Seems to me some things are up your head but you won't be able to physically perform. I mean are you ready to see your wife do it with another man? It is obvious that envious feelings do arise sometimes if compatibility isn't matched. It may ruin your relationship afterwards. Lure her into dirty talking and porn watching. Until that it is just a long shot waiting to be missed. Just my opinion.

RE:Are you ready for it?

Leave jealousy @ the door. Appreciate how lucky u r! My wife just has a wine or 2& then she's a dirty slut. She always comes home with other men's jizz in her holes! Lately she's convinced me to eat the cum out of her!!!!