First time here looking help me

Hi, sexxy--

Welcome to the site and the blogs.

As a woman, advice I'd give is to go to the chat rooms, get your name on the board by commenting and saying hi, be friendly and respectful, and don't push it. People are more likely to talk to men in pm's there once we've seen you around for a bit.

Advertising on the main room chat board there that you're looking for X Y and Z is unlikely to get many results; just chat and get to know people. It takes time, this is not a "log in and shag" site for most, no matter what people like to think.

In time, someone will come along.

The blogs are a good, safe place way to go, too, but though many prefer them as a way of meeting people, I prefer the chat rooms.

The fetish chat room sounds like your thing, but not as many people go there.

Welcome.