Let me tell u a lil abt myself.
Even though im like a lil boy down there, i don't beat myself up abt it.
Im hung like a midgie and i don't know what 2 do with it.
So gals if your looking for 2" or more then jog on!
My love life is so terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty &
if it wasn't for pick-pockets and frisking at airports I'd have no sex life at all!!!
Im of the opinion that Bisexuality doubles your chances of a date on a Saturday night.
I am always looking for meaningful one night stands
As long as I can remember, I've had amnesia.
And sum1 once asked me do i get my sayings mixed up???
What does the Pope S**t in the woods?
I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot & my Incubator had tinted windows!
When my house got robbed the other day the robber made me wear the mask.
As u can see from my foto i've a face like a stunt mans knee (U know, the type to make an Onion cry!)
I look as though ive been dookin for apples in the chip pan with my face set on fire & put out with a golf shoe.
Im totally high maintenance, I've got 15 kids to 20 different women.
I smell like a tramps jock strap, im riddled more than Da Vinci Code & im as lousy as Mick Jaggers vest.
My life right now is busier than a one-toothed man in a corn-on-the-cob eating contest but I've always got time for the right lady.
Work
I was a Trapeze Artist but i recently got let go, before that i was a trampoline salesman off and on, I also gave up being a psychic as i just didn't see a future in it to take up mirror installation as that's a job i could always see myself doing. Again didn't work out :-( nor did my 3 months at the Helium gas factory, I quit because i refuse to be spoken to in that tone!!
So i then studied to become a Lawyer but 99per cent of Lawyers give the rest a bad name so decided against it,
Was studying Cole’s Law at the time But found it full of cabbages.
Watch What ur Saying & What ur doing!!
My mum managed to mix mine and my dads pills up.
Now he's thrashing round the house with my glow sticks and I've got a rager!!
Previous Relationships
I dumped my last GF as she got the sack from the Sperm bank, for drinking on the job.
I know u’ll love me because im a Sagittarius, half manhalf horse! ;-)
Seeking Couple
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| Gender | Male |
| Age | 42 |
| Location | UK, Scotland: Glasgow, Glasgow |
| 🌈 Sexuality | Straight |
| 🌎 Ethnicity | White / Caucasian |
| 🍷 Drink | Socially |
| 💊 Drugs | No |
| 🛡️ Safe Sex | Always |
| 📏 Height | 5ft 10in (178 cm) |
| ⌛ Body Type | Athletic |
| 👱 Hair Colour | Dark Brown |
| 🦵 Body hair | Wild |