2:19 pm Monday, 13th December, 2021
patb675
Hi, my Lambi Rides ID is patb675. I write Short stories and draw cartoons. Here are two stories, of the funny type. Hope you'll like it. Thanks.
Nurse Dames Bond: "Dr. Know, I notice you don't prescribe any MEDICATION."
Dr. Know: "That's because I prescribe MEDITATION. The difference is C T."
Nurse Dames Bond: "Ceetee? A whistle? What do you mean Dr. Know?"
Dr. Know: "MEDICATION has a 'C' and MEDITATION has a 'T'."
Nurse Dames Bond: "A Sea and a Tea? Not a whistle."
Dr. Know: "I prescribe paying attention to the functioning of your body."
1. Mrs. Mareez and son Sonny
: "I am Dr Know. Know with a capital 'K', and you are?"
: "I am Mrs Mareez, Mareez with a 'zee'."
: "And I am Nurse Dames Bond I am Dr. Know's apprentice assistant.
: "Mrs. Mareez, is here for a ROUTINE checkup."
: "RUE TEEN? I can see what you mean. You must be in your late teens Nurse Dames Bond.
: "Yes I am A-TEEN."
: "Ah, 'EIGHTEEN' a nice ripe age to begin your career."
2.
: "Mrs. Mareez, I will give you some MEDITATION that should take care of your illness for good."
: "Dr Know, I think you mean MEDICATION?"
: "Nurse Dames Bond, could you give me a PAD please?"
: "Dr Know, I-beg-your-parden... Er, I don't have any PADs with me."
: "Oh no Nurse Dames Bond, must I always remind you? I mean a prescription PAD."
3.
: "Good morning Mrs. Mareez. Hello sonny, what is your name?"
: "My name is Sonny you big bully. I don't like you stupid doctors, you give injections. I hope God will punish you'll."
: "Now, now Sonny, behave yourself, that is no way to talk to Dr. Know. Dr. Know, Sonny is only 5 years."
: "What's wrong with Sonny, Mrs Mareez?"
: "Mum. i want a ear phone like this stupid Doctor has. Please Mum, can i have one?"
: "Sonny, It is a stethoscope."
4.
: "Nurse Dames Bond, i am on my hospital rounds, take care of things in my absence."
: "Miss, this won't hurt, it will be over soon."
: "Doctor NO, Doctor NO."
: "Yes? Did someone call me?"
: "Screeeeeeem. Get out you pervert."
5.
: "And what is the matter with Sonny?"
: "Mum, i want ear phones like the stupid doctor has."
: "It is a stethoscope Sonny."
: "I want Stethoscope ear phones, I want Stethoscope ear phones. Please Mum, I want Stethoscope ear phones."
: "A stethoscope is used to hear the HEART BEAT. Now stop saying that."
: "I don't know what ART BEAT is, but I know it is a gendre of music. I want Stethoscope ear phones. My Sony earphones are not working."
1. Luke Warmwater.
: "Hi Doc., I am a NEW patient."
: "How do you do? Pleased to meet you. I am Dr. Know, with a capital 'K'."
: "This is my first visit to you Dr. Know."
: "Nurse Dames Bond, this is a 'KNEW' patient. And this is my apprentice assistant nurse, Nurse Dames Bond."
: "Dr Know he is a NEW patient not a 'KNEW' patient."
2.
: "What KNEW?"
: "Patient."
: "I mean what 'KNEW' are you?"
: "Dr. No, I already said 'patient'."
: "Ok, what is your first name?"
: "My first name is Luke."
: "Ok, so that is Luke KNEW. Hehe, Luke KNEW what - just joking."
: "Doctor, I think I know what you are getting at. I am not a 'KNEW', I mean I am a NEW patient."
: "Oh, So you are not a 'KNEW'? Nurse Dames Bond, why did you not tell me."
3.
: " So what is your full name Mr. Luke?"
: "My full name is Luke Warmwater. I am a N-E-W patient. This is my first visit to you."
: "I am not dumb, I am aware of N-E-W. Nurse Dames Bond will assist you in filling in a form. Nurse Dames Bond, please assist Mr. Luke Tepidwater to fill in a form."
: "Dr. Know, my name is not Luke Tepidwater, my name is Luke Warmwater."
: "Whatever. Nurse Dames Bond, please do the needful."
