Is my dating luck changing?

VidaLaFierce

Ok, it’s story time folks! I’ve shared a couple of stories from my reasonably distant past before about dating disasters and, shockingly, shamefully, sadly, these are pretty much the only dates I’ve ever actually been on. (And the audience collectively and sadly exclaims “awwww”)
So, here I am with a large double chocolate macchiato preparing to give my best Carrie Bradshaw impression as I write about what’s looking to be a little new experience for me. I almost feel like I should be wearing Manolo Blahniks and have a mass of curly blonde hair and be wearing poor combinations of designer wear. Yes, I’m sat here gazing out of a misted up window with an inane grin on my face listening to a piano rendition of Disney’s ‘Beauty and the Beast’ soundtrack and being one of those people I absolutely can’t stand, but I just can’t help it at this point.

So, a couple of weeks ago, I was out after a gig - quick reminder, our island is safe and Covid-free, so life is mostly back to normal in our own bubble. It’s fairly standard: Gig, drink a little during gig, go out after gig. There was an extra celebratory feeling, as our island had beaten a Covid outbreak again and our circuit-breaker lockdown had been a success and we were free to get back to normal. So, I was still in full face and had jeans and a nice Versace top and my trusty leather jacket on and went to my usual haunt. My best friend couldn’t make it out as he’s planned as he wasn’t feeling great, but after weeks cooped up, I was dying to be out. It’s a small community over here and there’s not a lot of late night places, so you can go out alone and not stay that way for long, because you’ll know loads of people. Plus half of the gig attendees were joining.

So, it got later in the night and I was trying to get a drink when a guy started talking to me at the bar. Yes, this happens sometimes, but this time, there was something different. For once, it didn’t feel like awkward small talk. He told me he’d seen me around before and been dying for an excuse to speak to me for ages and I thought that was cute. We spent the rest of the night talking and it was really easy and nice. There was even some cheesy flirting later when I bought him a drink and after a long chat about how much we both love Disney, the Disney-related chat-up lines weren’t even slightly cringe-worthy, but actually really cute. For this reason, let’s call him ‘Charming’.

Closing time soon arrived and we left, grudgingly. The night was not over, however, as he said he’d walk me to a cab and we set off. The weather was bitterly cold and the temperature just below zero felt so much colder as the gale force winds were like tiny knives to the face. We were walking down a backstreet and talking quite animatedly, with him telling me a little about himself. I was realising I was quite attracted to him and a started to get nervous, which usually results in one of two things: I’ll either start stuttering like some sort of idiot or I’ll go completely the other way and won’t be able to stop talking. Strangely, it was a weird combination of the two this time, before he grabbed my hands to walk them up and kissed me. It may have been sub-zero out there, but in that moment, I warmed right up. And then the strangest thing happened. I didn’t fuck him.

Yes, I’m fully aware this is all sickening, but I’m sharing this because it’s exciting and all rather new for me. I’m rather good at being a bit of a tart, but never really had much of a chance to get into the whole romance thing, despite it being something I’ve always wanted. That whole thing about it just creeping up on you when you’re not looking is so true! I wasn’t on the hunt, I wasn’t even thinking about it and suddenly, there it was! Next time I’ve lost something at home, I’m going to try just not looking for it! The fact is, I know what I’m doing when it comes to flirting like a dirty trollop, but this has me thrown. I feel like a clueless teenager again, but it feels so good.

So, for the first time, here I am planning dates and stuff. Conveniently, we both live in a similar area of the island and both work in the same other area, so we’ve discussed lunch dates at a little Chinese café near both off our offices and we’re also thinking of taking in some of the eighties movies at the local cinema. There was a moment the night we met where he was holding my hands to keep them warm and hummed a little bit of ‘When You Wish Upon A Star’ and, for a second, made like we were going to dance before we both giggled and he kissed me again. This is making me think of maybe a dance class as a potential date at some point, but I’m not sure. Like, who would lead? I’m taller, but he’s definitely the man. I’ve never had to think of these things before!

The other thing that’s really nice is that there seems to be no urgency to rip each other’s clothes off and have sex. I’m liking the idea of taking it slow! In fact, one of my close friends has strictly banned me from shagging him until we’ve been on at least two actual dates. Unusually for me, I’m totally fine with this! For once, this is about something other than sex and if he’s new to the dating men thing and I’m new to the whole romance thing, then we can work our way through it nice and slowly, which is something I always felt like I’d been robbed of by never having that sort of nice, sweet, innocent young love. The nervousness is actually quite pleasant in itself!

So, this weekend just gone, the snow bollocksed up pretty much everyone’s plans. Snow as an adult isn’t the same as snow when you’re a kid. When you’re a kid, it’s pretty and exciting and sometimes means a day off if it’s on a school day, but as an adult it’s more of an inconvenience. Yes, it’s pretty, but getting anywhere, doing anything, all a massive pain in the tits. So, we had loose plans to meet up if we both happened to be out that night and he messaged me after he’s been out for a snowball fight with his friends (so cute) to tell me that night time plans looked doubtful. Later in the afternoon, the snow had stopped and actually started to clear pretty quickly, so I messaged back to say I’d probably still be heading out and that I was hoping to casually bump into the beautiful guy I’d met last weekend. It came over better than it sounds, obviously. A little while later, he replied enthusiastically telling me how sweet I was and that I should let him know if I make it out and he’ll come and join. He even scored a million points extra for squeezing a Star Trek reference in there, despite Trek not being one of his fandoms. This one could be a keeper folks!

So, my friend and I went down to our regular haunt and were out in the smoking area chatting away and I’d made sure I messaged to let Charming know we were heading out if he wanted to join. We’d been there about half an hour and he appeared behind me with a drink for me and a huge hug to go with it. I introduced him to the guys and we all chatted til closing time. Lo and behold, I somehow hadn’t managed to scare him off and neither had all the good natured but possibly quite terrifying banter! At the end of the night, he was getting along with my best friend brilliantly and we all walked for a cab. My friend got one and Charming and I stood around chatting for a bit. In fact, as soon as we were alone again, he kissed me again and neither of us wanted to leave. So we didn’t for at least an hour! We talked about all sorts. He was telling me how happy he’s been since we met and I said I was too. He’s told me he’s already told his brother and his ex-fiancé about me, which was unexpected but sweet. He explained that he’s very close friends with his ex and that’s actually quite nice (even if a little terrifying). He saw me get nervous so kissed me again.

You know, it might not even go anywhere, but even if it doesn’t then I’m just happy I’ve had a couple of weeks of that excitement, the giddiness and the butterflies. Now I see what all the fuss is about and I’m looking forward to navigating my way through whatever uncharted territory is to come. But this time, I might not be navigating it alone…

So, here’s where you guys come in…. What dating tips do you all have for when it’s all cute and you’re taking it slow? Give me a little guidance here! Is a ballroom dance class a good idea for a date? It might bring our Disney movie fantasies to life! So, let me know in the comments and until next time, stay safe, stay sane, keep wishing upon a star and stay… Vidalicious! X

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