(A developing economy perspective)
While the world is griping with the Pandemic and swinging scene for a few, which included us (There were also crazy pepole hosting parties at peak of pandemic. Lol!) was almost non-existent. We got to take a good break and look at our experiences till date, how we could have made it even better for us and our friends. Most importantly we had a talk on when to stop being part of this lifestyle - because for us atleast this is just an alternative lifestlye, not something we do 24x7.
I understand sex and non-monogamy can be quite addictive and people tend to over indulge. However, for us the choice has always been to swing only with a select few whom we connect with, on all aspects. That said, during our experiences we have met few elderly (55+) or couples who are in their late teens (18+/21+) desperately wanting to experience lifestyle in its full.
While entering young may help you amass
Unless you are a gross exception to the rest let me explain why it is not practical to start swinging too early or continue with it post your 50s. Like any opinion there will be haters and there will be likers but this ofcourse land of freedom of speech (India) and internet binds us all.
So here goes.. especially in a developing economy like India life can be quite stressful - work balance sucks, if you have offsprings then it's additional stress levels as you get no support from the government unlike developed countries, health facilities are expensive etc. etc.
So considering all this, if you were to start swinging in your late teens or early 20's you would not be able to focus on what's important - career, relationship and building a stable foundation (emotional, psychological and financial) for years to come. Unless you are exceptionally rich or inherited great wealth from your folks - you still need to focus a great part of Iife to ensure all the wealth doesn't goes to waste and can sustain your generations to come. Swinging takes a lot of dedication and is ofcourse addictive. All the more likely to pull them in with it's all-consuming attraction. Secondly and most importantly - maturity. Both maturity of body and of mind is something that is required very much for Swingers. Our experience - ideal age to start on your journey is early or mid 30's. Life is more sorted, you have enough life experience under your belt to take on things as it comes.
Now, on the other end of the spectrum there are these sweet (sometimes desperate) elderly couples who still try (mostly unsuccessfully) to meet people and get their grind on! My respect and heart goes out to them. However, at this point it should be evident that either they started the journey too late or have had too long a ride. My request to them would be to let the next generation enjoy and you revel in all the life has to give and not look at taking. Please don't try so hard. I know people with more experience know this. However, there maybe a few exceptions. One of the most common being; when one has been doing something with so much of passion for a long time - one might develop tunnel vision. They only focus on what's next in front. You don't take a look back or zoom out and take a larger view. See, with most ladies the sexual drive takes a massive dip post menopause. During mid to late 40's for most it's all about PMS, hormonal dips and lot of stress unless to take care of your body extremely well - no drugs or alcohol, cigarettes, right diet and exercise etc. This is highly unlikely to sustain in a developed country; more so in a growing economy unless you are part of a top few percentage.
Same is the case with their male counterparts.. the toils of a long run career is quite evident on their physique, in their libido and performance in bed. While they may think they are still able to get it up/ Climax, Sex is much more than that, as we all know.
While we can't generalise all scenarios and there is exception to the following age by +/- 5 years. We feel ideal age to get out of the lifestyle is in your early 50's. Ofcourse, one off rare indulgences will keep happening and is also required to break the monotony. That said one should be more happy with what life brings you and not keep on chasing tail like in your younger years.
To give our example, we were lucky to be married and mature enough at a young age to realise that we want to enter the lifestyle young. However, at time of entering we did fix a timeline of 10 years to amass all good memories and take a gracious exit from the main stream lifestyle. After our experiences and understanding our frequency of meeting people (maybe we meet 1 or 2 couple a month) we have extended our exit point to 43 year of age. However, that's keeping in view our physique, fitness routine etc.
So if you are in this lifestyle, I would implore you to take a few hours, days or weeks and think it through:What are you looking to achieve?When to take it slow? When to Stop?
Non-monogamy is good, but it can't be the all-consuming purpose of existence; can it?
I hope this article gets to thinking beyond who to bang-bang next weekend. I would request anyone not to take it personally and look at the larger picture.
Stay safe, happy and healthy. Even if we haven't met, I still love you and wish the best in life for you. Cheers.
8:28 am Friday, 8th July, 2022
Spl2some
Really thoughtful, may be it is the kind of first of useful insight article and it may call it as swinging map as it mentioned when to board and when to get off(important). |
Bi Couple who are educated and good natured. Want drama free couples single ladies for friendship and kinky meets *Not looking for single gents - don't Spam*