I pinched this but it made me chuckle

slicknik

This useful tool,commonly found in the range of eight inches long, the functioning of which is enjoyed by members of both sexes is usually hung, dangling loosely, ready for instant action.It boasts a clump of little hairy things at one end and a small hole at the other. When used it is inserted,almost always willingly, somtimes slowly, sometimes quickly, into a warm, fleshy, moist opening where it is thrust in and drawn out again many times in succession,often quickly, and accompaniedby squirming bodily movements.

Anyone found listening in will most surely recognise the rhythmic pulsing sound, resulting from the well lubricated movements.

When finally drawn out,it leaves behind a juicy, frothy, sticky white substance,some of which will need cleaning from the outer surfaces of the opening, and some from its long glistening shaft.

After everything is done, it is returned to its freely hanging state ready for yet another bit of action,hopefully reaching its bristling climax twice or three times a day,but often much less.It depends how often you clean your teeth with your toothbrush

Hahahahaha x

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