A Tongue-in-Cheek Guide Lesbian Archetypes

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Not all lesbians are made equal, well they are all equally enticing but that’s a different topic. if you’re trying to decide where you fall on the lesbian spectrum or want to be prepared for your next party at a gay bar, here are 6 lesbian archetypes you can expect to meet. Plus, some ideas on how you can make sure you are the one they go home with.

1. The Lipstick Lesbian

This queen is guaranteed to grab your attention in any bar or club. She’s generally the beautiful fashionista with long hair and gorgeous eyes (thanks to liquid eyeliner). The beauties are often referred to femme’s, for their soft femininity. Far from wearing lipstick, she’ll probably have full glossy lips that are just begging to be kissed.

Getting her attention: These lovelies are super popular and always in the spotlight. Be firm, make a confident move and yes, you love all that glittery crap as much as they do.

2. The Chapstick Lesbian

She could be as eye-catching as the Lipstick Lesbian but feels more comfortable in casual clothes like jeans and a tee shirt. Her hair is loose and natural, and she wears little to no makeup but still has that attractive feminine quality that will turn your head. She’ll probably enjoy biking, surfing or even longboarding which is where her sun-kissed complexion comes from.

Getting her attention: She will want someone loyal who can make her smile and isn’t scared to get outside for a hike or a surf. Be sure you can keep up before stepping into these waters.

3. The Alpha

The Alpha will make her presence known and all she needs to do is give you one of her withering looks. Make no mistake you will be ridiculously aroused and incredibly intimidated all at the same time. The Alpha will be the pouty, smoky-eyed goddess at the end of the bar with short quiff hair and some intriguing tattoos. She will be able to regale you with her adventure in turning straight women, and perhaps give you a live demonstration of her superpowers.

Getting her attention: Landing an Alpha means using yourself as bait, be bold, be arrogant but be willing to let her put a leash on you. She’ll make you pant for more.

4. The Butch

The Butch lesbian is most likely to be found laughing in a group of other butch lesbians scoping out the hot women they’re there to hook up. She will generally be kitted out in a comfortable shirt with jeans and boots, no heels here baby. Most telling will be her haircut, she loves a brush cut or similarly short do that looks great paired with black-framed glasses. She’s a huntress and loves to eat out her prey. You’re welcome. 

Getting her attention: She’s looking for a little princess who she can spoil and who will do as she’s told in the bedroom. If this is what you’re offering let her know and she’ll take it from there.

5. The Boi Lesbian

These are lesbians who are very boyish in their appearance and their charm. They have a tender youthful look to them and can be insatiable little sex machines with a penchant for older partners. Be sure to check in with them on their pronouns though as they can get a little sensitive if you use the wrong one.

Getting her attention: Given her more boyish looks she’s not likely to get many compliments. Tell her she’s beautiful and you’re ahead of the game.

6. The LUG

This lovely creature is far more likely to be found in a college or university bar given that LUG stands for Lesbian Until Graduation. They are mostly straight young women who experiment with girls while they are studying and go on to marry men and have family’s post-graduation. All we can say here is get her while she’s hot. Getting her attention: The LUG is not in it for a relationship, she wants to party and have sex. If you’re happy to get tipsy and have hot sloppy hook-ups with no strings, then she’s the girl for you.

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