Are You A Cock Shot Criminal? Get the Best Out of Your Dick Pics
11:48 am Wednesday, 19th July, 2017
A well-placed and actively utilised hand can make the difference between a sterile nude and one that will turn your receiver on. However wrapping your hands around your trouser snake like you want to throttle it has an opposite effect. It will do wonders for your dick pic if you use one hand to teasingly hold the base of your cock, or leave it hovering tantalisingly nearby.
The bottom of the dick pic barrel. A log is when you take a zoomed-in pic, with your whang taking up pretty much the entire frame and with little else going on in it. Let’s face it: doesn’t really matter how good-looking your dick is, it’s boring in isolation. Receivers appreciate a bit of context. Don’t be afraid to include a generous swath of your torso and thighs.
You can let down an otherwise solid dick pic if your bedroom is a messy disaster, or if your body is cast in the harsh glow of a laptop screen. Details matter. If you’ve taken a decent dick pic but you’ve taken it in a toothpaste-flecked mirror with a pile of dirty laundry in the background, for the sake of your dignity do a quick clean up and shoot it again.
A shot taken from above while lying down can really let us marvel in all your fan-tallywhacking-tastic glory. Try to get more than just your crotch into the snap to avoid potential log photos occurring. Include some tasty thighs and tum.
A recurring and dispiriting trend in the world of dick pics is for photographers to line their penis up alongside inanimate objects for scale, such as a shampoo bottle or the TV remote. Pics like this can demonstrate insecurity, which is the exact opposite of the erotic confidence we want the photo to capture in the first place.
If you aren’t going the whole hog, there’s nothing wrong with a clothed crotch shot. Leaving something to the imagination can be very erotic. Sexy boxers or briefs that fit well can look very tempting. Just make sure nothing is hanging out the side!
A shot taken from beneath, so your junk looks like a torpedo. Just bare in mind that we may get a glimpse of delightfully hairy ball sack. Try to think of the viewers point of view. What would they like to see?
Don't overthink your angles. Yeah, you might think you look a little better when you're angled 80 degrees to the left and leaning backwards with your right hip pushed forward, but be aware that things can look really awkward, really quickly. Don't over think it, body contortions are rarely sexy.
Do some pre-photo shoot manscaping. This can only help your situation. Yes, it may take a bit of effort, and We’re not saying you have to be completely hairless. But if you're going to take a photo, why not make yourself look as put together as possible. Show the viewer that you put a little bit of effort it, it can go a long way. Note: Only forgiven if you are wearing trousers with the zipper down and you have untucked your pockets to look like elephant ears - who doesn’t like comedy?!
Ever feel self-conscious about how you look naked? If all else fails then fancy dress is the answer. Adding a hat, googly eyes, a smiley face, in fact any accessories you want, will spice up a penis picture and will have the positive side effect of leaving you feeling super fabulous.
So there you have it guys. What type of pork sword snapper are you? Any more photo-taking tips? What do you like and dislike about dick pics? Tell us in the comments.
On a site of this nature, dick pics are all around. But how do you make yours stand out from the crowd? In honour of National Lollipop Day this week, we give you some common cock shot mistakes and how you can make your lickables look the best they can.
The Strangler
A well-placed and actively utilised hand can make the difference between a sterile nude and one that will turn your receiver on. However wrapping your hands around your trouser snake like you want to throttle it has an opposite effect. It will do wonders for your dick pic if you use one hand to teasingly hold the base of your cock, or leave it hovering tantalisingly nearby.
The Log
The bottom of the dick pic barrel. A log is when you take a zoomed-in pic, with your whang taking up pretty much the entire frame and with little else going on in it. Let’s face it: doesn’t really matter how good-looking your dick is, it’s boring in isolation. Receivers appreciate a bit of context. Don’t be afraid to include a generous swath of your torso and thighs.
The Slapdash
You can let down an otherwise solid dick pic if your bedroom is a messy disaster, or if your body is cast in the harsh glow of a laptop screen. Details matter. If you’ve taken a decent dick pic but you’ve taken it in a toothpaste-flecked mirror with a pile of dirty laundry in the background, for the sake of your dignity do a quick clean up and shoot it again.
The Birdseye
A shot taken from above while lying down can really let us marvel in all your fan-tallywhacking-tastic glory. Try to get more than just your crotch into the snap to avoid potential log photos occurring. Include some tasty thighs and tum.
The Scaler
A recurring and dispiriting trend in the world of dick pics is for photographers to line their penis up alongside inanimate objects for scale, such as a shampoo bottle or the TV remote. Pics like this can demonstrate insecurity, which is the exact opposite of the erotic confidence we want the photo to capture in the first place.
The Brain
If you aren’t going the whole hog, there’s nothing wrong with a clothed crotch shot. Leaving something to the imagination can be very erotic. Sexy boxers or briefs that fit well can look very tempting. Just make sure nothing is hanging out the side!
The Submarine
A shot taken from beneath, so your junk looks like a torpedo. Just bare in mind that we may get a glimpse of delightfully hairy ball sack. Try to think of the viewers point of view. What would they like to see?
The Bender
Don't overthink your angles. Yeah, you might think you look a little better when you're angled 80 degrees to the left and leaning backwards with your right hip pushed forward, but be aware that things can look really awkward, really quickly. Don't over think it, body contortions are rarely sexy.
The Wooly Mammoth
Do some pre-photo shoot manscaping. This can only help your situation. Yes, it may take a bit of effort, and We’re not saying you have to be completely hairless. But if you're going to take a photo, why not make yourself look as put together as possible. Show the viewer that you put a little bit of effort it, it can go a long way. Note: Only forgiven if you are wearing trousers with the zipper down and you have untucked your pockets to look like elephant ears - who doesn’t like comedy?!
The Artful Todger
Ever feel self-conscious about how you look naked? If all else fails then fancy dress is the answer. Adding a hat, googly eyes, a smiley face, in fact any accessories you want, will spice up a penis picture and will have the positive side effect of leaving you feeling super fabulous.
So there you have it guys. What type of pork sword snapper are you? Any more photo-taking tips? What do you like and dislike about dick pics? Tell us in the comments.
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