Escaping A Swinger Party If It Gets A Little Uncomfortable
10:47 am Monday, 28th July, 2014
There’s the extremely obvious...tell the host that you’re not getting into the party and are going to head off. You could go off on a slight tangent from the truth and tell them you’re not feeling too well but then, what if they’re otherwise occupied in sexual entanglement? A great host wouldn’t be caught up for too long and would be free soon enough but they also want to have fun after all.
So, in the event of your host being otherwise taken and you feel a little rude literally just walking out the front door in front of everyone, what can you do? There’s the old pull-a-sicky, you’ll most likely have had enough practice with this back in school. Tell anyone that you don’t want to play with that your belly’s hurting a bit and not to go near your back-door as you had a rather lively chili-con-carne earlier. If this doesn’t deter them, pull out the big-guns of your finest acting skills. Grab your stomach, muttering something along the lines of ‘Uh-oh it’s coming’ and run like a headless chicken to the nearest bathroom. Upon leaving the toilet, should someone still fancy a go with you after all that, give them all the gory details. ‘Watch yourself, it was coming out of both ends just before’ should do it. Chances are following this, there will be no questions asked and the front door will be opened rather swiftly for you.
If you’re wise, you will have your phone and Oscar-winning acting skills handy. Make sure it’s on complete silent mode as you’re going to look a bit of a clown having a fictitious conversation when the phone actually starts going off. Don’t be over the top, you don’t even need to say much, in fact usually the less you say the more believable it’s gonna be. So get your slightly worried face on and simply mention an emergency, they won’t ask questions.
Then there’s the stealth option, creep your way to escape if you’re really that weirded out. Excuse yourself to the bathroom but look for a way out along the way, bedroom window, bathroom window, back door etc. Make sure you haven’t forgotten anything along the way because you’re really gonna look odd trying to climb back through a window or knocking on the front door when no-one had even realised you’d left.
So escaping a less than desirable party is much like how you may have gotten out of school in the past, act your way out or sneak out!
So you’ve been handed a golden ticket into someone’s home for a swinger party. Fantastic! However, what happens in the case that you end up feeling uncomfortable rather than having an unforgettably amazing time? The people there give you the shivers or perhaps it’s simply not cracked up to what you thought it’d be and you want to get out of there one way or another. OK you need an escape route, read on.
Be Honest
There’s the extremely obvious...tell the host that you’re not getting into the party and are going to head off. You could go off on a slight tangent from the truth and tell them you’re not feeling too well but then, what if they’re otherwise occupied in sexual entanglement? A great host wouldn’t be caught up for too long and would be free soon enough but they also want to have fun after all.
Pull-A-Sicky
So, in the event of your host being otherwise taken and you feel a little rude literally just walking out the front door in front of everyone, what can you do? There’s the old pull-a-sicky, you’ll most likely have had enough practice with this back in school. Tell anyone that you don’t want to play with that your belly’s hurting a bit and not to go near your back-door as you had a rather lively chili-con-carne earlier. If this doesn’t deter them, pull out the big-guns of your finest acting skills. Grab your stomach, muttering something along the lines of ‘Uh-oh it’s coming’ and run like a headless chicken to the nearest bathroom. Upon leaving the toilet, should someone still fancy a go with you after all that, give them all the gory details. ‘Watch yourself, it was coming out of both ends just before’ should do it. Chances are following this, there will be no questions asked and the front door will be opened rather swiftly for you.
Oscar-Worthy Performance
If you’re wise, you will have your phone and Oscar-winning acting skills handy. Make sure it’s on complete silent mode as you’re going to look a bit of a clown having a fictitious conversation when the phone actually starts going off. Don’t be over the top, you don’t even need to say much, in fact usually the less you say the more believable it’s gonna be. So get your slightly worried face on and simply mention an emergency, they won’t ask questions.
Go,Go,Go!
Then there’s the stealth option, creep your way to escape if you’re really that weirded out. Excuse yourself to the bathroom but look for a way out along the way, bedroom window, bathroom window, back door etc. Make sure you haven’t forgotten anything along the way because you’re really gonna look odd trying to climb back through a window or knocking on the front door when no-one had even realised you’d left.
So escaping a less than desirable party is much like how you may have gotten out of school in the past, act your way out or sneak out!
Blog Introduction
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