"See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side
I'll wait for you"
We all come with excess baggage. Some people hide it well while some amble on to life lugging it around like heavyset rocks on their backs. Me? I'd like to think I am capable of depositing mine at hell's gates in a moment's notice. I refuse to dump my mistakes and regrets on other people's plates. When I exercise my radio silence, it just means I made a much needed trek to the garbage disposal for me to unload whatever crap I managed to absorb. I need those days so I can return to my happy go lucky ray of fucking sunshine self. While it is true that I will never allow myself to need anyone anymore because I have come to terms with so many things in my life, it doesn't mean that I don't appreciate those who get my quirks. Dealing with me requires the patience of a saint too. And I'm eternally thankful to those talented folks who mastered the art of Lianne's moods. Y'all deserve an award!
"Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And I wait without you"
As a creative, my infamous and sometimes complex train of thought extends to a very colorful bedroom romp (mis)adventures. It is imperative to choose a bedmate whose soul is as dark and passionate as mine. Sexy time equates to a whole lot of awkward and funny moments because of the ideas I long to unleash. One thing I've always hoped my sex life to be is explosive. Because I have had mediocre and I swear I won't ever look back on those lackluster nights of so and so excuse for pathetic sex. I will gladly take myself out of that equation, thank you very much.
"My hands are tied, my body bruised
She got me with nothing to win
And nothing left to lose"
The storm surge that is Lianne will leave one dumbfounded and confused. I may be generous to a certain degree because I love spoiling people. But don't be deceived. I am very stingy with my love because when I decide to do so, I love hard. Those who have had the pleasure of being on the receiving end of it can attest to my intense nature. I've never learned how to gamble. No idea how poker works. Hell I don't even know how to push the button on a slot machine. I may be adventurous but I'm far from reckless. As I always say, the only game I'm good at is not playing hard to get but hard to forget.
"And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give, and you give
And you give yourself away"
Those who know me will say that I won't ask for much because I've lived with too little. So they give it all without preamble because they want to, and not because I expect them to. I give without taking. I want without needing. Because therein lies the beauty of life. To find out that you have the power to make someone smile because of an unselfish gesture. To leave bits and pieces of your soul to any stranger you come across in the hopes of finding it back once more. But until then, you know you're okay. That you're broken yet whole. And you can learn to live without noticing the cracks and damages you once endured. Then you'll know, you're imperfectly fine somehow. 💕
"With or without you
With or without you
I can't live
With or without you
With or without you"
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4:59 pm Monday, 26th February, 2018
That song of U2 gets to me every time |
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2:49 pm Tuesday, 27th February, 2018
Hey, it's my anthem. How are you? It's been a while. |
