We've been together for 9 years now and often chat about how far we have come as a couple. We have both learnt so much about ourselves, about each other and helped the other to let go of some mental baggage. It has been liberating our journey together, a real turn on.
It's amazing when we talk about and think back to certain milestones:"The first time I sent her a Gif with a couple getting it on" (I remember texting her this and holding my breath worried that her reply might be "that's disgusting" or "don't send me stuff like this"). It actually had the opposite effect, turned her on, loads, she was out shopping and messaged me back telling me how much she needed to see me. The relief and following text conversation continued for the rest of the evening. We were living in different cities at the time, the distance coupled with us both searching for and sending images all night had us both climbing the walls.
We regularly send each other erotic images and Gifs now. It has become part of our relationship, we love searching for black and white erotic art to share. As we both became more comfortable with finding and sharing images with each other it opened up new lines of conversation. We started to talk more about what we liked and didn't like which was fantastic.
What's really enlightening and great about these conversations is three fold.
1. We got to discover that a lot of things she liked and he liked were really similar but we up until then, hadn't had the balls or opportunity to share with each other. So many things we'd kept in our heads, were actually a turn on and regular thought for both of us. It was amazing, we could now start talking to each other and gradually exploring each others minds and imaginations. 2. Some of the things he shared I hadn't considered before but after thinking about them and us both discussing became a real turn on for me. I felt comfortable talking about FFM (a juicy example coming up here for you he he) but hadn't really thought about MFM. When we watched a few movies together and talked about a few scenarios it really turned me on. Our conversations evolved into a younger guy, an older guy, two guys with him watching, three guys, being blindfolded and not knowing who the 3rd guy was, having someone to tease, him taking the lead and organising or me taking the lead, having someone hung for me to play with. The list goes on, as does our conversations. One of us mentioning something the other hadn't considered and this being the catalyst for an entire new tree of thinking and thought. 3. You learn about yourself, what makes you tick, what makes your partner tick and in turn you grow and develop your sexual self and mind. The trick with all of the above is TRUST. I love him and he loves me. I love her and she loves me. We don't need to worry about anyone else, just each other. All of our conversations are just that. Conversations. We don't get jealous, we talk about anything, we don't get insecure, we aren't watching a porn together and thinking "oh that's the type of man or woman they want". Its just a porn, we are watching it to get our rocks off together, we are watching it to turn each other on. This leads us to our last point and final thought. Would be great to hear your thoughts on this.When we watch a porn / talk about something / share an image with each other or fantasy we noticed something. Lets use porn as the example as that's easiest. Sometimes we might watch a movie and someone within the porn will look amazing. We'll chat about having her, him or them joining us. This happens not so often but we are both totally cool with this. Watching a movie knowing she is being turned on by a guys penis is great, or knowing he is turned on by a woman in the film is so fun. We will join in with a story or two to really tease each other. More times than enough its not really the person in the movie though. Its the scenario and both replace the characters in the scene with one or both of us. This is fascinating we think. Once in a blue moon someone will catch our eye in a movie. Most of the time its the scenario. He often prefers to imagine her in the scene and be watching from the camera angle. She does the same with him. What's great though, is when we watch something together and imagine us both in the scene. Our bucket list is growing pretty quickly to be honest because of this. Our list varies from trying a few positions, having an extra set of hands or lips. Sometimes our list goes full steam ahead and we imagine a couple or two joining in. We are curious, do many of you guys do the same thing and tease each other, chat about different scenarios together? Are any of you guys still not comfortable enough yet or haven't took the step to discuss what you both like? Maybe we should create a game or list of questions and tasks for couples who are still a little shy. Do you have a 'list' of things you'd love to experience or for your partner to experience or is it more of a 'go with the flow' type approach?
