A Tuesday Rant - not really one for light entertainment

Thank you MissValiant. Not only has venting my spleen actually made me feel better but so does your comment. x

If it feels better dearest Turquoise ,give me a punch on the nose.I'm a member of the gender that has upset you but too thick to feel any pain xxxxx

Quite right Miss Valiant ....and if I want to do an impersonation of Jeremy Corbyn, I damn well will ! xxxxx

Fetch, I regard you as far too much of a good friend for me to punch you. Besides, I'll only hurt my hand!

Should the twain ever meet Turquiose lady, I'd bring me guitar and strum it whilst you sang. Good choice of song - treat others how you want to treated I think is the message.

As I found my little rant to actually make me feel better, I am now throwing this blog open to one and all as well as all and one to vent their spleen also in the hopes that you will also feel better. If you can throw in an appropriate song, I'll be right here singing it with you.

x

Deborose - totally agree with you about regular dating sites. I think I prefer the majority of men that I talk to on here to any that I have met back in the day when I used to date. All for the simple reason that most men on adult sites are so much more honest and upfront about what they want (not to mention how they want it!) than those on dating sites.

Good luck on that dating site deborose! x

Bloody 'eck, did I just imagine a whole post from deborose and respond to it?! Criminy, what the heck was in that cough medicine I just had?

Oh, I've been deleted plenty of times. Of course, that was in my other incarnation as CensorFairy so in the end it was only a matter of time before they deleted me completely!

I don't know know if it is age that is the issue. I dimly recall my 30s and had problems even then meeting blokes. One of my closest friends said I was far too picky. My criteria were: single, straight, male, a functioning brain and around my age group. So many people are now used to convenience this that and the other, perhaps they no longer feel they have to take the time or effort for a real relationship.

Sheesh, that must have have been one fat frog suechris. Sending you both a hug and hope that makes you feel just the teensiest tad better

Sounds like Mr Texty was in reverse when he tried to apply some psychology, back fired on him, he obviously underestimated your need to be comfortable and must be a russian - nowhere

MissValiant I'm shocked! You have just destroyed all my preconceptions of this site in a single blog post....
You mean to say I've spent every single minute of my time here fully suited & booted doing my best suave & sophisticated Daniel Craig impersonation in the vain hope that I might receive the occasional pm (unlikely) or non computer generated mail (unbelievable) has all been for nothing? Now I've discovered that you're all more likely to be dressed as Hilda Ogden than Claudia Cardinale I will revert back to Steptoe instead of Bond.
You've shattered my dreams :-( ....

Now if only there was somewhere I could have a rant about it?

And why aren't CurlyWurlys as big as they used to be?????

Alas averagejoe, nothing is as big as it was in our youth.

Im sure some men do realize that you wont be wearing Senza etc but just have to ask that anyway, nice to hear your rant anyway

I'm happy to chat with anyone, but for UKEurope purposes it would mean doing so at some ungodly hour for me, and I need my beauty sleep :-) In fact that's another reason why I don't spend interminable hours in site chat until the wee smalls. Anyone over there fancy chatting me between about 1-6 AM UK time? No, I thought not :-)

I seem to have developed this reputation for being that big, scary anti-food troll. Can't for the life of think why :-) I'm perfectly willing to concede that food does have its place in the great scheme of things, especially when I'm staring over a plate of fettuccini and grated truffles at a gorgeous candle-lit cleavage, with thoughts of what direction the 'dessert' will take :-)

Wee smalls? Skebbie dearest, do feel free to rant and expand about your smalls if you so wish but please omit all details of the wee. This blog is open to all topics but wee! With that, I'm off to bed now and look forward to waking up to read all about your smalls! x

Re "smalls" :

Those (of course) would be my famous BHS "slips". However, I can assure you they *are* laundered regularly :-)

An invitation to rant ? One of the things that really annoys me is the tendency of car manufacturers to give their models silly, meaningless names. I would not care to be seen in a car called a Duster,Yeti or any others with names which for all I know, may translate from some obscure language into " Look at that twat behind the wheel "
Now to reply to the invitation to sing.Debs referred to Hot Chocolate.Here is one which I performed on Karaoke a couple of weeks ago ,which has a special meaning for me and had the audience in tears ( due probably to me being off-key )
" When you can't take any more.
When you think your life is over.
Put down your tablets and pick up your pen,
And I'll put you together again "
( RIP Erroll Brown )

"Karaoke"..... Japanese can be such a rich language, can't it ?
Our lives have been transformed by other examples, such as "bukkake", "cosplay", "shibari", "kinbaku", "no-pan kissa"....(er.....OK maybe I can explain that one later.....:-), "tsunami", "emoji", "sushi", "edamame".......oh dear.....even I seem to be getting bogged down by food as my ideas run out, so I'll curtail the list there............... :-)

Exactly my sentiments, SueChris. It's despicable that publicans and restauranteurs should be allowed to shirk their obligations to be on call 247 for the likes of us. Reminds me of those famous lines uttered by Richard E. Grant in that great Cumbrian saga "Withnail and I": "I demand the finest wines known to humanity, and I want them NOW !!"

Oh.....just occurred to me. I wonder if the gent who is the subject of this blog has ever ventured to peruse these pages? Might be an eye-opener for him :-)

"this is not likely to be a blog that gets a lot of comments"

Seem to be doing OK so far :-)

Suechris, if I ever become your local publican, I promise to do all my socialising within the pub environs. I hope you guys will be ready to turn up to some very strange pub nights!

Skebbie dearest, he is on a different site but is aware of who I am on here. Whether or not he will ever bother to venture on here to check out my shenanigans is entirely up to him. Hmmm....that reminds me, I really need to start paying people on here to start blogging about how fabulous I am.

Suechris, I think you're being rather judgmental on the undies front. Some people might not be wearing any so will be neither dubious nor non-dubious.

Oh, Deborose, not the skid marks! Although I was thinking about that this morning over coffee but didn't have time to post about it. You beat me to it m'dear!

Yes agree with a previous comment..you are too polite..tell them to go boil their head...not all men are twits..but if I ever meet one who isn't? I'll let you know!!! Hahahaha 😊

Deb,
Thanks, was eating my pasta as i read that..luckily i have a strong stomach and could eat me pasta lunch outta said skiddy undies without chundering...probably would struggle with a thong though.

Turquoise, you devine sexual lady that you are..
What can i say, superb blog as usual but then no less that i would have expected from your impeccable standards.
Sorry, i must be imbarassing you with the compliments, they are totally unnecessary as we all know, but we just cannot help ourselves... In fact i would go as far as throwing myself into a puddle for you to step upon to prevent your perfect feet from becoming moist.
And if you could make the cheque out to my friend Mr Cash.

And to the blog in hand...
I try not to come across as pushy, i find it downright rude...apologies if i have ever seemed that way but when it comes to the written word you are only ever one punctuation away from looking like a total berk!!!
I do like skype and there is a common misconception that it is used only by pervs that wanna see you in yer undies while they knock one out or by yer nan when she is on her holidays...
Not so, i only ever use it for text and the occasional voice call, those are very occasional and most cannot understand me east london accent or lingo.
And i hope that when i am in conversation with someone, if it ain't working i can spot the signs and move on...i am always polite and enter into conversation if approached but i will never pursue..
That's how i see it should work but there are those, mainly men but some females that take it as an insult when you say no...
i have been on the receiving end of a femdom that turned real nasty...just no need.
Understand no means no and f**k off means never.

As for a song, one for the guy that inspired the blog and dedicated to my Pablo honey,.

I don't care if it hurts,
I want to have control,
I want a perfect body,i want a perfect soul,
I want you to notice, when I'm not around,
You're so very special,
I'll have the special.
But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo,
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here.

Accept his apologies and move on no point ive getting stressed out about it as it won't do you no good . On a positive note ,at least you made up a great song we can all sing a long to .

cantbearsed - Steph780 has actually said what I would have in response to you! Yes, I was very upset but I'm not anymore as he's apologised. Now he knows me a bit better as a result! In any case, I have my own flaws for him to discover so no point in holding onto my hurt feelings.

Welcum - cheque is in the post! Um, you've got my post in your hand? oooer, missus! Well, whatever floats your boat dearie. No judgments here!

I for one have never thought of you as the pushy sort Welcum. I consider you when of the gallant gentlemen of the site actually. Funnily enough, like you, I primarily use Skype for exchange of the written word. The only time in the last year or so I've ever used it to speak to someone was for a job interview.

Like the song lyrics, they just made me laugh!

While I get the rant, they guy was obviously trying to force your hand, and your clearly a free spirit, from a purely objective perspective, you serioulsy underestimate your natural beauty, and those dimples, to die for, slobs or not, did the guy not realise how fortunate he was just to have your number??

Turquoise,
Thanks for the compliment.... Gallant gent, well thats a first..i am honoured to be considered in a similar league to Fetch although as much as i aspire to achieve his lofty heights, alas i feel it is a challenge to great for a mortal such as myself...

Deb,
So there are two of us Radiohead fans left that have not either topped ourselves..
I stayed in the village where he lives in Cornwall, on the off chance i might meet him...
I discovered the local brew called Rattler, and well don't recall much of my week there.
Look up Richard Cheeses version of Creep, you just can't beat a large dose of Dick Cheese.

Thank you Dombull, you almost have me blushing!

Goodness me, they actually expected you to CENSORED? You've got to watch out for those folks who expect you to do the w word. Proper deviants they are. As for the rest, I really can't comment chocolatelover. I've never had a hangover in me life. 0:)

Are you saying, Welcum, that you are unable to rise to the occasion? Oh my...!

Turquoise,
There is not a challenge i have not risen to yet...
I may not achieve the full and final goal at the outset, but i am dogged and determined and will remain for the full duration, and more, to undertake the task in hand, until bloody, beaten and broken, i am forced to give up....but trust me i will never give up or shirk my responsibility to that end...
And given the correct stimulus, i always quickly bounce back and use another tact to acheive that final outcome....

But in the stakes of gentlemanly conduct, if i can match up to be half the gent that Fetch is, i will be more than happy...

Oh, that had my laughing out loud Welcum - thank you for my first laugh of the day! x

Blush? I can help with a lot more than that x

I can't really understand it, when blokes do that, I hope you have stopped chatting with mr texty

Well I will be in town Tuesday & Wednesday, if you want to get dinner and a show and perhaps explore your blushes in greater detail

Turquoise,
Always glad to please..
Lets see if i can give you one tomorrow morning too.

"Well I will be in town Tuesday & Wednesday, if you want to get dinner and a show"

Off to Covent Garden no doubt :-)

Not sure i want to see it, whatever it is...
I did have plans to visit the big smoke tonight but think i may stick to the safety of Essex instead..
Well, its not like i have nothing to do...
For some strange reason i am left with fifty gallons of chocolate blancmange and ten thousand oreos...
Now that sounds for an interesting night in alone!!!

Well done you....and thank you for opening this blog. I had a good read and it cheered me up so much. It is nice to read comments from real people. I seem to get so many automated messages I was beginning to wonder if there were real people out there. Good on you

Dadaron, thanks for the comment but I'm going to wait to see how things go. If he tries to pressure me again over something, my shoes, boots and trainers are all made for walking. Well except for the ones that have 3"+ heels and then I'll just be tottering.

Thank you for the kind invitation Dombull. However, I will be safely ensconced outside of London for some weeks.

Welcum, I'm still waiting for "Lets see if i can give you one tomorrow morning too". Although given you have 10,000 oreos, to only want to give me one oreo is a trifle ungallant.

Thanks sandydunes for your lovely comment. I didn't expect this to generate quite so much interest and it's been fun reading all the comments. Don't despair, there are plenty of real people around. Seek and ye shall find! Good luck!

Turquoise,
The offer was out there, you know how to make those oreos yours...
I would hurry though...think the choclate blancmange has seen better days now..
Seems to be little flecks of green appearing, i do believe it is turning into mint choc chip...

Pay attention Welcum. I'm only after one thing - your oreos. :)

It felt cathartic reading the Story