Deviant - What is in a word

Mr C,
Have you ever thought that vicar may have been the wrong career option?

However, the good book does say "go forth and multiply"....
As a kid i could never work the link between religion and maths,
But then i found out it was actually a polite way to tell someone to fuck off.

Welcum...send him my way.....you rarely find anyone here who actually wants dinner and a movie....

Most people have no idea what a swinger is or the many, varied people who are on swingers' sites. Mention that word and they immediately envision a bowl with different keys or some sort of orgy.

Yet if these people who wish only for a no strings relationship or a fuck buddy or three actually sat down and used their noggin, they would realise that they are not that different from many on here. Honestly, at the end of the day or night, if you're on Blendr, Grindr, Tinder, etc your hardly being shown matches of people that hold the same values or are interested in the same social stuff as you. You're going to see those who are geographically near and available with only a picture of their face. If you fancy the look of them, you message them. If not, you swipe on. Your decision is based on how hot you think the other is. The only difference between a swinging site and one of the so called dated sitesapps is this: people on a swingers site are more honest about what they want and who they want.

The preconception misconception....being a swinger is not (yet) acceptable according to the social mores.

eroticgoddess, I want dinner and a movie on occasion! :)

I like swinging.Have you ever heard the Count Basie Orchestra's interpretation of " April in Paris " or the Sinatra album" Songs for Swinging Lovers "? They are the epitome of swing........or have i mis- understood the topic ( as usual ) ?

EG,
I would send him your way but just a few moments ago he informed me that he has got a meeting with a girl this weekend, but what to do?

The following conversation may make you think twice and kinda explains why he is now single..

Pub is too boring, lunch or dinner at a hotel was a little too presumptuous and i couldn't think of any half decent restaurants in the area he mentioned..
His suggestion.... Trampoline world????
Dunno, the mind boggles!

So the question is, would you want to go trampolining?

Fetch - have you tried out Lisa Stansfield's "Swing" soundtrack?

In the interest of obtaining further information purely to help EG with her answer I have to ask Welcum - will your friend be willing to go trampolining wearing a kilt in the traditional manner?

Turquoise. I'll make a point of trying to fond it xxx

Fond it ? ...I get worse by the day !

Erotic Goddess. I have already promised you dinner and a visit to the Royal Opera House when I get back .Please don't stand me up ! xx

Fetch - you just made me burst out laughing as I misread your reply as "trying to fondle it"!

Turquoise,
I have asked the question....
NO.....
He seemed rather disturbed that i was asking such a thing...

Anyway, due to popular consensus, he is going to go ice skating and then a meal in Londinium....
Far better call than trampolines.... What the bloody hell was he thinking,
The youth of today, who understands em!

Thank you for asking Welcum. Likely he wasn't disturbed by you asking the question, he was probably having indigestion or gas. You know how it is with kids these days.

Ooooh, ice skating!! I want to go ice skating!! But probably not with your friend Welcum....sorry. But I still want to go ice skating!!!! SOMEONE TAKE THIS DEVIANT ICE SKATING!!

Um, sorry, I might have got a bit carried away there. I just sort of like ice skating. Just a bit. Ahem. I'll just go now....

fetch..i've been waiting ages for you. Over a year, to be exact. But if the friend of a fellow on here wants to meet me...who am i to say no?

Turquoise,
He was right to feel disturbed...
Anyway,
I would love to take you ice skating, the rink at Somerset house always seems great...
But let me paint the picture for you..
The Disney animation Bambi!!!!
It is just embarrassing.

EG,
I will let you know if it don't work out with little miss Tinder...

Welcum: It's all a question of semantics I reckon. I've always thought "swinging" was a daft, somewhat antiquated expression that conjures up an image of 60s wood veneered furniture, universally brown fixtures and fittings, sleazy looking blokes with kipper ties, oily quiffs ans sideburns, ghastly tarty looking female make-up, blue films and John Holmes. Also the use of "fanny" and "VD" in conversation :-)

Many women I have talked to assure me that "conventional" dating sites are just as heavily populated by men looking for a quick shag as sites such as this one. It's just that "sex sites" start with the lowest common denominator and you have to work up from there, whereas on the conventional ones you have to start at the top and then whittle away until you get to the lowest common denominator. The modus operandi - and effort expended sorting the wheat from the chaff - works out about even, I reckon.

The chances are that your mates are probably just not very sexually adventurous. It's not their fault - they were just raised that way. They're probably the type who would come back from the pub, have a quick fumble in the dark with the wifeGF, climax in mish after half a dozen half-hearted thrusts, and then doze off thinking they're superstuds while half the house reverberates with their elephant seal-like snoringsleep apnea syndrome :-)

Skibbie, I am laughing. You always make me smile honestly.

Welcim: I have to say that the term swingers was not introduced to me until later in life and the first time I hear the word, I thought of sin and hell (I know religion at its best).

The truth is swingers had a very negative connotation at that time and has even nowadays. Furthermore, many people will not even research and just think what other people say to be the truth. One more thing, people are afraid of finding out things outside the parameters and comfort zone.

I never planned to sign up to this site but I was curious and willing to hear not just about them but other options. Unfortunately, not all human beings are the same and that always generates empty debates like the one you witnessed Welcum (I am being polite here).

I guess the problem is that a lot of folk are just dull...and think shopping is an actual past time, that the voice is telly worth watching and that shagging is only done with girls from within 14 of a mile of where you were both born, raised and live to this day.

Hey Doc Zee,
Its always great to hear from a learned and esteemed gent such as yourself...
I geuss they are all kinda insular, but what you have to bear in mind is the logistics of the situation..
Some of the baboons are part of some wierd genentic experiment to create the missing link...
They are quarantined to the strange island they inhabit and i think two of them share the same fingerprints...
Oh, and they all have beards...i was taught never trust a man with a beard, they are either sailors or paedophiles...
Well that fact has held me in good stead all these years, the evidence.. Cpt Birdseye and a Aussie tv presenter that enjoyed blowing a didgery doo!

My friend is not so insular, he was willing to cast his net in a ten mile radius which most of which covers the north sea...the woman he has contacted lives within that radius but due to the large body of water between them, namely the Thames, he has to do a 120 mile round trip to meet her.

Yours and Skebbies statements about being adventurous probably run true, the bit that does seem to me like double standards is that they would be quite happy to go to the pub with the intention of picking up a female solely for sex...

So what is the difference from that to a site such as this?
Two people with the same intention, going to a location with the aim of making contact with a like minded individual...

WCD, I think the main distinction is that pulling some bird down the pub for a one nighter is 'the way it's done', and everyone has a few sweet sherries, so is ok.

Meeting somebody off a swinging site while stone cold sober is clearly seen as weird, maybe it's missing the manlyness of the 'pull'?

Doc Z,
That situation suits me fine..
Spent most of my adult life!working in bars and clubs and have seen plenty of "manly" men with one too many sherbets down their gullets making total berks of themselves, so most things i do i do stone cold sober....
And the beauty of this site is if you want to chat up a woman it doesn't cost you a Bacardi breezer "and one fer me mate too"

In my case, being the weedy geek that I am, if I'd tried to pull birds (i.e. attractive ones) by sidling up to them in a bar and coming out with all that cliched BS, the chances of my genes ever entering the gene pool would have been zero. Therefore, the internet came into its own in a nick of time as far as I was concerned :-) Having a presence in a place like this gives people a chance to reveal their....er......"hidden talents" to window shoppers, instead of adopting the persona of a half-drunk bespectacled middle aged gent sidling up and saying "if I said I loved you would you hold it against me?" or some other cringe-worthy salutation :-) Sites like this tilt the playing field slightly more in my direction, so perhaps that makes me a "deviant" :-)

When someone goes off to a pubclub on the pull, they can dress it up with meaningless so called romantic gestures by buying the other person those bacardi breezers that welcumdstraction mentioned. Although tbh, I prefer full fat coke. Anyway, the versimilitude of romance, means they're getting to know the other person. And because they're getting to know them, it's ok that a couple of hours later they end up doing the bouncy bouncy, horizontal lambada (or four footed foxtrot if that's your thing), meander around the pleasure garden and launch the meat missile. Of course they'll meet up again....or the one will text the other. Yeah right....

Which basically means it's socially acceptable to lie to yourself about what you're really after and be deceptive to whomever you end up with. Damn, I'm glad to be a deviant.

Welcumdstraction, I don't that if I've ever watched Bambi. Perhaps that's why I don't understand the relevance of venison steaks to going ice skating....

Hmmm.....it occurs to me that as this is a swingers site, perhaps I'm being inappropriate about clearly wanting to do a non-sexual activity (ice skating!!!). Does that make me a double deviant? Or just seriously confuddled?

Meat missile...first time i have heard that one in a very long time.

As for Bambi, don't bother watching it, it'll make you cry..well it does me but i'm a softee woofter!
I cannot ice skate for toffee, or any other sweets for that matter...
Will stick with what i am good at, skiing, snowboarding and watersports.

I have looked up all the meanings of deviant...there really doesn't seem to be anything wrong with it,
So from now on i am gonna embrace my deviant side and if anyone wishes to join me...;-)

One of my regrets in life is that I never got into ice skating,particularly ice hockey.On second thoughts, by sticking to rugby it was much easier to behave like a hooligan whilst on Terra Firma. I just wish that turquoise had been there to massage my aching muscles and apply soothing balm to my bumps and bruises.I wonder if the promise of a venison dinner,washed down with Coke then a visit to the cinema where we could both have blubbed during the showing of Bambi, would have tempted her ?

send him my way honey.....it's hard to find anyone here who wants a meal and a film....

Sounded like a good night to me.

Hey like ur profile 

What I have noticed and I suppose may of been guilty of in th he past is I think many or the non experienced anyway tend to post adds and do contacts when horny be it men or women and some have wants and expectations much higher then practical so unless the person with the add is Mr or miss super perfect sexy they are not interested.I personally do obviously like the looks but prefer to find the one with the right attitude and respect.I have of the years had some top shelf women and a couple have been very good to play with and others are relying on there looks and I have also train some genuine average looking people that have been excellent in everyway.I think your friend is on the rebound which is common for men and is probably trying to hard..tell him relax and just be civil make conversation not involving sex and once a women feels safe and non threatened they will show their intersest

HIII

 Very well said my friend. So many bell- ends out there. There has to be still more change in attitudes, but it all takes time . You can please some people some of the time but you can’t please all the people all the time. Bob Marley said it a long time ago!

Absolutely nothing wrong with sexual deviance. In fact I'd rather be a kinky bastard than a boring low testosterone man. I'll repeat...as long as nobody gets hurt, psychologically hurt or disrespected we all good baby

I LIKE FEMALES