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Music and Musings: Somewhere in the Middle

10:21 am Sunday, 9th November, 2014

"It was such a bad disguise
did you think for second I would not realize
Tripping hard falling down onto the ground
cause I can't stand up
and I can't fall down
cause I'm somewhere in the middle of this"

I found myself reverting to the alternative genre. And the profound lyrics of this song speaks volumes. Dishwalla is also a favorite band of mine. JR Richards is hawt with a capital FUCK ME, so the gravitational pull is not surprising.

Taking calculated risks is part of perception management. I am very passionate and even adamant about managing one's shit. I detest people who advertise and bemoan their pathetic plight. I do get it, the need to vent out. But again, the keyword really is shouting out their sad and sordid state to EVERYONE within hearing distance just how horrible their life is. Like the rest of the conformists, I am not fond of alcohol and rants, moreso if the person monopolizing my time is just a mere acquaintance. For crying out loud, I don't need to know why someone's significant other chose to fuck someone else who apparently is a lesser being than the one I got stuck conversing with. Sheesh. Get over it already.

It sucks to be in a limbo. Your own purgatory on Earth. Not knowing where you stand leads to not knowing where to go from there. At the same time, you have qualms in wanting to find out because you're not quite ready if the result is the opposite of what you want to achieve. So yeah, that epic middle place somewhere is a curse and a blessing. You're not crushed but the oblivion becomes a pseudo lifeline to keep you functioning albeit in auto pilot mode.

I'm still trying to decipher if such state is better than dooming a situation even before you give it a chance to flourish. Then again, risks are part of life. Even though you took the time to carefully weigh the outcome, life still has a way of fucking with our heads. And that sucks the most. Go big or go home. I'm honestly terrified but my mind is made up. Here's to hoping for the odds to ever be in my favor.

Have a great week y'all :-)

"When I drink I want you more and more and more..."





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Liannesweet on extended hiatus ;-)


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