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14/01/2005 4:18 PM
Re: timewasters
This reply is a general observation rather than a direct response to any individual.
Welcome to the world of swinging.
Timewasters have been the bane of my life since 1997 when I started building swingers web sites and for many years before that when using the good old swingers magazines.
As a single male you have an uphill struggle to overcome the legacy left by the thousands of single males who have let couples and ladies down over the years.
Jojo and I advertise on here as a couple, and have had as many timewasters as any other couple, here are some of the things that we have observed and learnt over the years.
It starts with the ad:
-- Its a one liner we dont read them, nor do many other people.
-- There is no picture - we want to see what the person looks like.
A response to our ads:
-- A one liner we dont read it
-- No picture or request for pictures we dont respond, as our ads tell people where to see pictures and requests that the respondent has a pic, a picture is easy to take, and simple to upload.
-- Request to meet, but he is in England, when we currently specify Spain.
-- The guy is older, younger, fatter, or hairier than specified in the ad.
-- The guy is married but playing away, a no-no for most couples as swinging is based on honesty, if you are lying to your wife, you are probably lying to us as well.
Then after a meet is arranged:
There are guys who have failed to show, or who have turned up late, un-shaven, un-washed, unable to perform, 4 stone heavier than their picture, 20 years older than their picture; the ones who have lost their mobile, or left it at home and could not let their hosts know they could not get to the venue; the ones who got lost going to the pub they arranged; the ones who forgot the date: forgot the time; forgot they had a wife at home; the ones who had no pennies to buy their hosts a drink when they met; the ones who forgot they had to work late; whose cars broke down; who leave without saying thank-you; ..
As a couple Jo and I meet lots of people every year. If the guys are polite, friendly, honest we recommend them to other couples we know, and who we think would like to meet them. Conversely we dont hesitate to let people know about the timewasters. Other couples do the same, so a bad reputation will spread just as a good one will.
The only advice I can offer is, be honest, polite, turn up if given the opportunity to meet, be clean, tidy, on time. If the worst does happen and you do break down, or get lost call the hosts, there are telephone boxes everywhere if you forget your mobile. Take the contact details with you.
When you meet be friendly with the husband as well as the wife, if you upset him, she is not likely to play, and you will not get a return visit.
Dont expect your hosts to provide everything, if meeting in the pub, buy the hosts a drink, if meeting at their home, take a bottle, and take condoms with you.
Hang in there and keep trying and you will succeed.
Write an ad telling people about you, your likes and dislikes. Have at least one clear picture on your ad, showing your face rather than your cock. Cocks are probably the last thing a woman or couple want to see.
When writing to people make sure you have read their ad. If you dont match the requirements dont write, you are wasting your time, and the advertisers.
When you get home, write a thank you note, or send a thank you text message. It goes a long way to getting you back into the ladies bedroom.
David & JoJo
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