Starting to Have Fisting Fetish

Whenever I feel bored, I would grab my laptop and be entertained by pornstars at youporn.com
If I was just as sexy as those women I guess I would want to be gangbanged!!!
But moving on, I'm alittle bit disturbed about my new obsession about Fisting and Gaping. Is it normal or there must be some psychological problem going on?

I really want to try fisting, I didnt have a long term partner so I have no fucking idea whom I'm gonna tell this. This morning, I tried to experiment as to how many fingers my pussy can take. I rubbed my clit, then tease my pussyhole until it got soaking wet. First three fingers felt so good but when I tried four it just started hurting. Does anyone know anything that I could do because I really want to take the whole fist?

I checked online on how Im going to start with it. But first I just need to look for a perfect partner. Someone I would enjoy this first fisting experience.

Here's the guides I read. Please let me know more if you have other ideas.

One way would be to get a large toy that is a least close to his fist size if not a little larger and then first work on taking the full size of that on your own but remember to work up to the size in small steps rather than forcing things which could cause injury that would take weeks to heal. Also when trying to take large toys it definately helps to have plenty lube and to push out with your vaginal muscles while pushing down on the toy as this help to open up.

Most importnantly though, take it slow and stop if it is painful.

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