Lost In Translation...

3:24 pm Saturday, 25^th October, 2014

Ok, so through a friend I meet a lovely Lithuanian bloke last Friday. Saw each other Saturday and Sunday as well, and again last night, thus breaking the "only get three dates" curse.

So last night, we consummate our friendship.
Now, ladies and gentlemen, this is where is gets...odd.

We do the deed...he asks "can I make piss in your mouth?", which I thought meant "can I come in your mouth".
So I nodded assent.
Then my brain screamed "THIS ISN'T COME, THIS ISN'T COME" as I ran to the bathroom to empty my mouth and wash my hair.

Go back to bed, he's looking contrite, then he said "but you gave me permission!"
I said yes, but I thought it was a charming Lithuanian term for cum.
He replied "you can piss in my mouth if you like?"
I declined.
Then he tried doing me up the arse.

Seeing him again on Tuesday.
In the meantime, I'm buying an adult phrase book, because frankly, online translators suck.
Plus I didn't even know a rock hard cock COULD piss.

Signed, a rather bemused Lilith Pissface.

Comments

rigger101uk	4:27 pm Saturday, 25^th October, 2014 By heck it all happens down there in Our Nations Capital... Anyway I am glad you are seeing him again. Take some mints with you this time.
rigger101uk	9:11 pm Saturday, 25^th October, 2014 Get him to drink his own bodyweight in gin beforehand. Or cider, depending on your preference. I would suggest Baileys but he would be barfing all over you if he did that.
doktorzook	6:14 am Sunday, 26^th October, 2014 Does any language have a charming term for cum??
friday194922	6:45 am Sunday, 26^th October, 2014 good to see you back on humorous form,personally i find it impossible to do,perhaps its just bladder control!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!img src="imagesadultemoticons007.gif"
friday194922	6:48 am Sunday, 26^th October, 2014 hmmmmm,most of that was innocuous! but i see heavily censored. img src="imagesadultemoticons010.gif"
rigger101uk	9:14 am Sunday, 26^th October, 2014 I wish I had thought of this earlier instead of at about 3 this morning.... Headline in tomorrow's Daily Mail: "Blowjobs at risk from East Europe peeing..." Oo is that my taxi? I'll get my coat
Skebbie	12:11 am Tuesday, 4^th November, 2014 "Anyway, I now have a raging hardon and nowhere to spend it. Sucks" If it's any help, I'll snake Dixon over the Urals like a Yukos pipeline, and point him in the direction of SE England :-)
Skebbie	12:54 pm Tuesday, 4^th November, 2014 Apart from English, Japanese is the only language my brain has room for. I did French, ancient Greek and Latin back in the day, but if I try to say anything in French these days, only Japanese comes out. I must say, though, that sex provides a great incentive to learn a foreign tongue (no pun intended).
Slow4u	3:23 am Wednesday, 3^rd December, 2014 Ohhh I wish I'd seen this earlier. I know we don't know each other Lillith, but I do enjoy your posts.. So I'm really sorry to have to say this, but.. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA !! PMSL!! WTF?? Ok, sorry again, ahem... I'm fine now. I bet yer now quite famous in Lithuania !! ;-) Ohhh I do hope he managed to post it online. No no I'm joking, that would be just AWFUL I'm sure you wont be scarred by this, a bit water-logged perhaps, but you'll dry out, eventually, probably. As for pissing with a stiffie, yeah it can be done, with great difficulty, but if you have to go, you have to go !! Mind you, trying to get an upward pointing willy to point down into a toilet bowl requires some contortions.. and would also make a good online vid, lol. Friends of mine swear that I should simply give in... and piss up in the air and over the bath.. If I was just a LITTLE older, (or drunker) I'd give it a try lol. It would be bliss haha.

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Lost In Translation...

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